How I Learned

Ben Lillie on TED and TV

2012-02-28T10:00:00.000-05:00

Tuesday, February 28th, 2012

From How I Learned You Can't Do That on Television: Stories About TV back in August, here is BEN LILLIE, co-founder of The Story Collider, on how he suddenly found himself off his meds and working for TED. Yes, TED.

Psst. Got a story about science? Contribute to The Story Collider's new online magazine.

Everything is so Relaxing

2012-02-27T20:11:00.000-05:00

Monday, February 27th, 2012

This is how we do it.

The How I Learned series has an intern and her name is Lyra Smith. I knew I liked her when I said I might want to do a parenting theme and she suggested I book Tina Fey or Doogie Howser. Here is Lyra's take on last week's show, How I Learned to Chill the F@#k Out About A Lot of Things, which was not only a great show, but also a major fire hazard. No way we would have made it out alive.

xo Blaise

This Month’s How I Learned was Amazing

By Lyra Smith
Photos: Alex Crawford

To quote Corky St. Clair, this month’s How I Learned was a Zen thing, like how many babies fit in a tire; and MANY of you already know this because you were THERE. Such a great crowd, so sorry I had to lie to your faces about my responsibilities to gain access to the bar. Don’t be mad at me. Calm down! We all learned some very important techniques for chilling the fuck out, y’all. Use them from now on, free of charge.

First, ERIN BARKER (The Story Collider) cleared the air, revealing the truth about her less than pyromaniacal past. Although there was a heavy dose of fire involved. What else was she to do really? A person can only take so many episodes of "7th Heaven" before they need an emotional cleansing via the flames of a cathartic house fire.

Erin Barker

Some stuff going on.

Then LODRO RINZLER (The Buddha Walks into a Bar), spiritually enlightened us with a story of the sexiest Angel ever to take a seventeen-hour train ride through Canada. If you’re suffering through a religious struggle, I highly recommend making out with the stranger sitting next to you. Right now. Do it. They’re writing a description of you in their head this very second. Readying it for a Missed Connection* as soon as they can find some free wifi. I promise. It’s written in the stars.**

Lodro Rinzler

Next up ELISA ALBERT (The Book of Dahlia)--yes, THE Elisa from Jewish teen pop group fame--explained what my uncle, who makes his own soy milk, has been saying for years: Dude, just, just some pot, man. It is one of the truest sentiments you will hear, but for some reason it has more weight coming from an intelligent, attractive young woman versus a man who wears Birkenstock sandals year-round.

Elisa Albert

JEFF SIMMERMON made me cry, and not just from the pain of his extremely firm handshake. He’s strong, guys. And his story of fighting testicular cancer ended in a delightfully odd moment of clarity. “Sometimes we find solace in the strangest of places.” – Your mom. Also, his girlfriend sounds really cool.

Jeff Simmermon

Fun times.

As Blaise put it best, “someone has to follow cancer,” and ELIOT GLAZER (It Gets Betterish) proved the only way to successfully follow cancer is by calling vaginas "chowder houses." I think he said the word “vagina” more times than Julianne Moore in The Big Lebowski and that is great! Vaginas are great! Eliot is pretty sure.

Eliot Glazer

"Va...gina...?"

So I invite you to my personal favorite cure for CHILLING THE FUCK OUT--that is attending next month’s How I Learned to Make the Grade: Stories about Education on March 28th (full-on details coming soon). Just look at the pictures taken last week by the incomparable Alex Crawford and tell me you aren’t looking for your old Adderall prescription already.

Fire hazard.

Erin Barker, Eliot Glazer, Lodro Rinzler, Blaise Allysen Kearsley, Elisa Albert and Jeff Simmermon. Table 7, y'all.

* Police report
** Police report

Never Forget

2012-02-27T16:46:00.001-05:00

Monday, February 27th, 2012

I'm behind on everything as per uge. There is only one of me and I'm really short. But remember January? That was when How I Learned celebrated its 3 year anniversary with How I Learned I'll Never Do That Again Most Likely featuring some super talented... talent. I just wanted to give you a recap in case you weren't there (which is crazy)--and if you were there, please join me now in reliving some of the funtimes with photos by the fantastic photog Alex Crawford of The Style Blogger. It'll be like we're doing it all over again.

LIANNE STOKES (The Frisky) read an excerpt of a chapter from her forthcoming debut memoir titled Below Average: A Lifetime Way Under The Bar. One of my fave moments of her story--about being the unwelcome third member of an interoffice love triangle--was when she called out her co-worker for owing her money and his response was: "I'll take you to Blockheads for Mexican."

LAURA JAYNE MARTIN (McSweeney's) schooled us on the seedy underbelly of soft serve, having once taken a summer job as an ice cream truck driver for a boss man named--yes--Jim Jones. Jim Jones hated everyone, according to Laura, and considered his soft-serve clients "lowlifes." Naturally.

I bet you didn't know that one time, Soundtrack Series creator and host DANA ROSSI decided that taking a shit ton of Herbal Phen-Fen was a safe and easy way to lose weight and a plan that would definitely not land her in the emergency room with a massive kidney stone and the desperate need to rely on her theatre degree just to get someone in a lab coat to pay attention to her pain.

Also, you probably didn't know that TED TRAVELSTEAD (Vanity Fair), contrary to his appearance, is "not a person who gobbles hallucinogens on a regular basis," and has "lived a primarily fear-based life." But his friend Brian had some mushrooms in his freezer and what ensued may or may not have involved an endless nature hike of terror and a life-changing trip to--where else--The Mall.

You may recognize MIKE DOUGHTY from the 90's cult rock band Soul Coughing. Well, now, in addition to having a successful solo career, he's also an author. "If you notice, it says DRUGS real big on the cover. The reason I did that is because when I see a book with DRUGS real big on the cover, I buy it." Sauced or sober, we love Mike Doughty. And you should totally buy the book.

So during the trivia/giveaway portion of the show the prizes included a gift certificate from Laura Jayne Martin, former soft-serve server, to The Big Gay Ice Cream Shop (totally wanted that for myself), and a copy of the DVD Children of the Corn II: The Final Sacrifice starring young Ted Travelstead. (Totally wanted that for myself also. Giving this stuff away is hard when you're greedy and get really excited about things.)

Children of the Corn II: The Final Sacrifice

That's it. That was the January show! To close out, here's (L to R) Mike Doughty, HIL alum LIAM MCENEANEY (Tell Your Friends!), Julie Wright, Ted Travelstead and Laura Jayne Martin. They had fun. Even Mike. That is his "fun" expression.

Thanks, as always, to the performers, to Happy Ending and to YOU for coming out to the show!

xo Blaise

Critics' Picks: Five Best Events This Week

2012-02-21T21:26:00.000-05:00

Tuesday, February 21st, 2012

Thanks, Time Out! Check's in the mail.

Thank You, Old Gray Lady

2012-02-17T11:57:00.000-05:00

Friday, February 17th, 2012

Oh, man. How I Learned gets a nod from The New York Freakin' Times today!

This is a sweet write-up on The Soundtrack Series, created and hosted by How I Learned alum Dana Rossi. I'll be telling a story at her show the night after the next installment of How I Learned.

Next Wednesday and Thursday is obviously going to be the best Wednesday and Thursday combo of all of our lives.

Photo of Dana Rossi by Spencer Ritenou

HOW I LEARNED TO CHILL THE F@#K OUT ABOUT A LOT OF THINGS

2012-02-07T11:24:00.000-05:00

Guys, I don't really know what else to say here. There's, like, a million things. Everything's fine. I need to calm down. Just come to this show or I'll have a total freakout.

***

The How I Learned Series Frantically Presents:

HOW I LEARNED TO CHILL THE F@#K OUT ABOUT A LOT OF THINGS

Featuring:
ELISA ALBERT
(The Book of Dahlia)
ERIN BARKER
(Co-Host, The Story Collider)
ELIOT GLAZER
(It Gets Betterish)
LODRO RINZLER
(The Buddha Walks Into a Bar)
JEFF SIMMERMON
(The Moth)
Created, Produced + Hosted by
BLAISE ALLYSEN KEARSLEY

Wednesday, February 22nd
8pm / Doors open at 7
HAPPY ENDING
302 Broome Street between Forsyth + Eldridge
J, M, Z, F to Delancey
B, D to Grand
FREE!

***

ELISA ALBERT is the author of The Book of Dahlia (a novel) and How This Night is Different (stories), and the editor of an anthology of essays about siblings. She teaches at Columbia, works on her new novel, and is mom to a small child.

ERIN BARKER is a writer and a copy editor who has worked with more than a hundred novels, including several New York Times bestsellers. If you catch her after the show, she will gladly explain to you the difference between who and whom. She is a producer and host of New York's only science storytelling show, The Story Collider, as well as editor of its online magazine, and she performs monthly with her storytelling team, Mimsy, at the Pacific Standard. She is a recent Moth GrandSLAM champion.

ELIOT GLAZER is a comedian and writer. He is a performer at the Upright Citizens Brigade Theater, and is an Assistant Editor at New York Magazine online. His web series, It Gets Betterish, can be found online at itgetsbetterish.com.

LODRO RINZLER is the author of the new book The Buddha Walks into a Bar: A Guide to Life for a New Generation. He is a practitioner and teacher of meditation in the Shambhala Buddhist lineage. His writing is regularly featured on the Huffington Post, the Good Men Project, Interdependence Project, and Shambhala Sun. One time, the drummer of Vampire Weekend called him "super smooth."

JEFF SIMMERMON is a writer and storyteller who regularly appears at shows around New York including the comedy, storytelling, burlesque sideshow And I Am Not Lying live at Union Hall on the first Tuesday of every month. He has written for Vice Magazine, appeared onstage at the Moth's GrandSlam, on This American Life and was recently published in The Post-It Note Diaries. He also runs a blog packed full of stories, art, and other weirdness at andiamnotlying.com. And even though he's been writing for years, he never gets any better at doing these bios.

Time Out's Best

2012-01-23T16:45:00.000-05:00

Monday, January 23rd, 2012

Time Out New York recently named How I Learned one of the best reading series in the city--along with a few of my favorites. Thank you, Time Out!

If you've been to How I Learned before, you know that it's more than just a reading series. It's sort of not a reading series at all. Except that sometimes some people read. But other times they don't. Other times they do other stuff. You should just come see for yourself... Hey, how about this Wednesday?

The How I Learned Series Presents:
HOW I LEARNED I'LL NEVER DO THAT AGAIN (MOST LIKELY)
Wednesday, January 25th
8pm at Happy Ending
Featuring:
MIKE DOUGHTY
(Yes and Also Yes)
TED TRAVELSTEAD
(SEX: Our Bodies, Our Junk)
DANA ROSSI
(Host, The Soundtrack Series)
LIANNE STOKES
(The Frisky)
LAURA JAYNE MARTIN
(McSweeney's Internet Tendency)
Hosted by: BLAISE ALLYSEN KEARSLEY

More Details Here...

HOW I LEARNED I'LL NEVER DO THAT AGAIN (MOST LIKELY)

2012-01-12T14:45:00.003-05:00

It's time! The first exciting lineup of the new year not only features at least one big beard and maybe some oversized black glasses, but also five funny writers and performers who've pretty much learned what not to do with drugs, diets, office furniture and ice cream trucks. I really think this show is probably the best thing for you right now. Hope to see you there!

***

The How I Learned Series Presents:
HOW I LEARNED I'LL NEVER DO THAT AGAIN (MOST LIKELY)

Featuring:
MIKE DOUGHTY
(Yes and Also Yes)
TED TRAVELSTEAD
(SEX: Our Bodies, Our Junk)
DANA ROSSI
(Host, The Soundtrack Series)
LIANNE STOKES
(The Frisky)
LAURA JAYNE MARTIN
(McSweeney's Internet Tendency)

Created, Produced + Hosted by
BLAISE ALLYSEN KEARSLEY

Wednesday, January 25th
8pm / Doors open at 7
HAPPY ENDING
302 Broome Street between Forsyth + Eldridge
J, M, Z, F to Delancey
B, D to Grand
FREE

***

MIKE DOUGHTY is a singer/songwriter, isn't that term awful? Please, somebody, come up with a new way to say that. He's been on Letterman twice, Conan once and Nulle Part Ailleurs three times. His albums Dubious Luxury, and Yes and Also Yes came out in 2011, and his memoir, The Book of Drugs, and another album, The Question Jar Show, are out in 2012.

TED TRAVELSTEAD is a writer and performer. He is co-author of SEX: Our Bodies, Our Junk, and has written for Esquire, Vanity Fair, Radar and McSweeney's. As an actor he has appeared onstage performing sketch and stand-up at various venues in NYC, and in a broad range of films, comedic shorts and music videos. He is a frequent tweeter, follow him here: @trumpetcake

DANA ROSSI is the creator and host of The Soundtrack Series--stories about songs--which happens the fourth Thursday of every month at (Le) Poisson Rouge. Her writing has appeared in the New York Press and Time Out New York, and she is a regular contibutor to InDigest and The Retroist. An essay of hers will appear in the upcoming anthology, Madonna & Me; Women Writers on the Queen of Pop.

Like any white girl who got an 820 on her SATs, LIANNE STOKES became a non-fiction writer. She's written for Playgirl, The Frisky, Rejected: Tales of the Failed, Dumped, and Canceled and The Drinking Diaries: Women Serve Their Stories Straight Up. Her debut memoir is aptly called Below Average: A Lifetime Way Under the Bar. In her spare time she talks to herself. And, yes, she really does think someone is listening.

LAURA JAYNE MARTIN's writing has been featured on McSweeney's Internet Tendency, The Hairpin, Slack Story, Thought Catalog, and in the forthcoming Fraudulent Artifacts: An Anthology of Pseudo-Interviews, Faux Lectures, Quasi-Letters, "Found" Texts, and Other Dubious Documents (W.W. Norton, August 2012). She lives in New York City.

[Facebook Event]

Fun Times, New Times

2012-01-08T20:45:00.013-05:00

Sunday, January 8th, 2012

Hi! Happy New Year! There are new(ish) photos below, and also How I Learned will be back at Happy Ending on January 25th (!), BUT FIRST:

I want to quickly thank all of you for coming to How I Learned in 2011, for spreading the word, and for keeping this series going over the last three years. I also must thank all of the 2011 performers who regaled us with their bits and stories and songs and excellent visual aids, and, yes, I am going to list all of them here: Mike Albo, Eugene Ashton-Gonzalez, Jami Attenberg, Craig Baldo, Elissa Bassist, Ryan Britt, Sarah Brown, Chloe Caldwell, Michele Carlo, Alexander Chee, Andy Christie, Jessica Delfino, Amanda Duarte, Ophira Eisenberg, Janice Erlbaum, Maggie Estep, Paul Ford, Jon Friedman, Connor Gaudet, Ed Gavagan, Eliot Glazer, Leslie Goshko, Brian Grosz, Melanie Hamlett, James Hannaham, Shawn Hollenbach, Cynthia Kaplan, Starlee Kine, Jillian Lauren, Brad Lawrence, Catie Lazarus, JiJi Lee, Ben Lerman, Ben Lillie, Sam Lipsyte, Lloyd United, Jim O'Grady, Alyssa Pinsker, Bob Powers, D.E. Rasso, Andrea Rosen, Andy Ross, Tracy Rowland, Sara Schaefer, Elissa Schappell, John Sellers, Amy Shapiro, Rachel Sherman, Tom Shillue, Amy Sohn, Joanne Solomon, Diana Spechler, Dodai Stewart, Victor Varnado and Lizz Winstead.

WOW.

Fun shows, good times and more to come.

Finally, major thanks to my amazing friends and beautiful acquaintances and everyone at Happy Ending, Union Hall and Time Out New York. I mean MAJOR.

xo + lots of gratitude,
Blaise

***

Some pictures from How I Learned to Say I'm Sorry (October 26, 2011) and How I Learned The Rules of Attraction: Stories About Online Dating (November 30, 2011)

Photos: Jesse Chan-Norris

Comedian CRAIG BALDO (Last Comic Standing) showing us his notes for the night--so we know what we're in for--at "How I Learned The Rules of Attraction: Stories About Online Dating."

Writer and producer STARLEE KINE (This American Life) on Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie at "How I Learned To Say I'm Sorry."

Singer, songwriter, comic, and all around performing gal, JESSICA DELFINO on Craigs List postings and the perfect mate at "How I Learned The Rules of Attraction: Stories About Online Dating."

Here I am--doing something, not sure what, maybe asking if my hair looks okay--at the online dating show.

And here is storytelling superstar BRAD LAWRENCE (The Moth) during his second How I Learned appearance, this time at "How I Learned The Rules of Attraction...."

Writer, storyteller and all around humorous person from Wisconsin ANDY ROSS (Real Characters) telling a funny and also sad story--my favorite kind--at "How I Learned To Say I'm Sorry."

Ladies being brought to tears--TO TEARS!--listening to Elissa Schappell at "How I Learned To Say I'm Sorry."

The one and only ELISSA SCHAPPELL (Blueprints For Building Better Girls). I mean, see above.

The great MS. JANICE ERLBAUM (Girlbomb) captivating us at what proved to be one moving night, "How I Learned To Say I'm Sorry."

Stay tuned for details about the January 25th show.

Can't wait to see you!

What She's Learned So Far

2011-12-18T20:01:00.002-05:00

Sunday, December 18th, 2011

Hello, HIL Friends-- I'm happy to share that How I Learned is on the Tin House blog with some love from Courtney Maum. Super excellent!

"I accepted a short-term assignment as a corporate namer in Manhattan—131 miles from husband, hearth and home. In order to convince a particular member of the aforementioned trifecta that this was a career move, I vowed to attend three readings a week during my NY exodus and to introduce myself to one person while there."

--Six Ways Reading Series Can Improve Your Writing

HIL WANTS YOU BUT NOT IN THAT WAY NECESSARILY

2011-12-05T18:32:00.008-05:00

Monday, December 5th, 2011

Guys, The How I Learned Series is looking for an intern!

This thing is growing and expanding with multiple opportunities on the horizon. I need a clever right hand man or lady, a sidekick-assistant-type person to help The How I Learned Series become as big an empire as Harpo Productions. BIGGER! It's going to be so great and super fun! YOU CAN BE MY GAYLE KING!

Seriously. If you or someone you know fits the description below, it would be crazy for you or them not to contact me.

Pretty awesome. Reliability, focus, follow-thru and enthusiasm a must
Interested in event production and all things literary, humorous and performative
21+
Great writing, editing, proofreading and research skills
Need I say internet and tech savvy in this day and age?
Someone with graphic / web design skills is a plus, but not required
Creative thinker
You know, just the right person for the job

Please send a résumé, along with an email of introduction, to howilearned at gmail dot com.

Oh, and please DO NOT send me a photograph of yourself. This isn't a casting call, and I don't really care what you look like. You would not believe the jpegs I've received. Or maybe you would.

Many thanks. I look forward to hearing from you!

Blaise

Andrew or Andy

2011-11-30T17:31:00.004-05:00

Wednesday, November 30th, 2011

Tonight's show--about online dating--is probably going to be a little less like this first clip and a little more like the second. You're welcome.

HOW I LEARNED THE RULES OF ATTRACTION: STORIES ABOUT ONLINE DATING

2011-11-17T14:12:00.006-05:00

This is serious. For the last show of 2011 we'll sit back, relax, have a couple of drinks, and talk about the world of computer dating. Don't be nervous. Just be yourself. Co-hosted by Chuck Woolery.

The How I Learned Series Presents

End-of-Year Show at Happy Ending
HOW I LEARNED THE RULES OF ATTRACTION:
STORIES ABOUT ONLINE DATING

Featuring:*
CRAIG BALDO
(Late Night with Conan O'Brien; Last Comic Standing)
CHLOE CALDWELL
(Legs Get Led Astray; The Rumpus)
JESSICA DELFINO
(NY Times Modern Love; The Sundance Channel)
AMANDA DUARTE
(Lucky Pink Wonderland; The Soundtrack Series)
BRAD LAWRENCE
(The Standard Issues; The BTK Band)

Created, Produced + Hosted By:
BLAISE ALLYSEN KEARSLEY

Wednesday, November 30th
8:00pm (7:00 Doors)
HAPPY ENDING
302 Broome Street, Between Forsyth + Eldridge
J, M, Z, F to Delancey
B, D to Grand
FREE!

***

JESSICA DELFINO is a writer, comedian, musician, teacher, and crafter. She has performed on ABC's Good Morning America, The Sundance Channel, and in the Montreal Comedy Festival and Ediburgh Fringe Fest. The story of how she met her fiance--via Craigslist--was featured in the New York Times Modern Love.

CRAIG is a stand-up comedian and writer for tv. He also tweets a lot which is why his bio is exactly one hundred and forty charactersssssss.

CHLOE CALDWELL is a non-fiction writer living in Hudson, New York. She has been published in an array of places including The Rumpus, Mr. Beller's Neighborhood and Vol 1. Brooklyn. She writes a column called "Love & Music" for The Faster Times and her story That Was Called Love was nominated for a 2010 Pushcart Prize. Her first book of essays, titled Legs Get Led Astray, will be released in April 2012.

AMANDA DUARTE is a comic writer and actor. She has appeared on The Soundtrack Series at (Le) Poisson Rouge and Losin' It at Branded Saloon, and wrote and performed two solo shows, Lucky Pink Wonderland at soloNOVA and The PIT, and Wonder Woman Spin at Judson Memorial Church.

BRAD LAWRENCE is a Moth StorySLAM and back-to-back two-time GrandSLAM winner, the author of the critically acclaimed one-man-show Monsters In The Wood, and a regular guest on The BTK Band, The Liar Show, the RISK! podcast, and anywhere else the performers get paid in drink tickets. He can also be seen on The Standard Issues, a live storytelling show he co-produces with his wife.

Here's the event on The Facebooks for your optional RSVPing pleasure.

* Unfortunately, Mr. Kevin Allison had to cancel due to illness. He'll be okay!

No Sleep 'Til Brooklyn

2011-11-15T15:46:00.002-05:00

Tuesday, November 15th, 2011

YAY, BROOKLYN! I'm so pleased to have been able to bring How I Learned to my home turf. Where I live. In my very own Grey Gardens. Last night's one-nighter was, in a word, awesome, if I do say so myself. Maybe there should be a How I Learned one-off in all five boroughs! Next stop: Staten Island!

Just kidding. I'm not going there.

BUT, thanks to all of you who came out to the Brooklyn show. Thank you to JOHN SELLERS for his excellent show-and-tell and for coming out of the closet as a Wham! fan. Thanks to ANDY CHRISTIE and Artie Christie, and their dad, Mr. Christie, and all the people who died at Mr. Christie's rooming house. Thank you to MISS SARA SCHAEFER for loving Jesus and also having the devil a little bit inside of her simultaneously. Thanks to TOM SHILLUE for that Boston accent and for teaching us about fire safety. Thank you to MIKE ALBO for not succumbing to a freak accident in high school like the rest of them. And a special thank you to Miss Jinners for giving me the go-ahead to bring my show to Union Hall for a night.

Best one-night stand ever.

Stay tuned: Details for the next show How I Learned the Rules of Attraction: Stories About Online Dating -- back at the Happy Ending bar -- will be posted ~~tomorrow~~ the day after tomorrow. Right here.

xoxo Blaise

Monday Night HIL at Union Hall!

2011-11-10T20:56:00.009-05:00

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Guys, Join us Monday 11/14 for super fun How I Learned time at Union Hall in Brooklyn. Right near my house. Don't go to Happy Ending because we won't be there! (We'll be there later in the month, though.) Details below, after the Crue.

The How I Learned Series Presents...

HOW I LEARNED YOU CAN'T GO HOME AGAIN:
STORIES ABOUT WHERE WE GREW UP

Featuring:
MIKE ALBO
(The Junket)
ANDY CHRISTIE
(The Liar Show)
SARA SCHAEFER
(You Had To Be There)
JOHN SELLERS
(The Old Man and The Swamp)
TOM SHILLUE
(The Moth)

Created, Produced + Hosted by:
BLAISE ALLYSEN KEARSLEY

Monday, November 14th
7:30 Doors
UNION HALL
702 Union Street + 5th Avenue, Brooklyn
B, Q to 7th Avenue
2, 3 to Bergen Street
R to Union Street

$8 / Get Your Advance Tickets Here

***

MIKE ALBO is a writer and performer who lives and loves in Brooklyn. He's written for all sorts of magazines and newspapers including GQ, The New York Times, New York Magazine, and many others. He is the author of two novels, Hornito and The Underminer. This August he released his first novella through Amazon's Kindle Singles called The Junket.

ANDY CHRISTIE's writing has appeared in the New York Times, in snooty literary journals and in the Thomas Beller anthology, Lost and Found: Stories from New York. He has been heard on NPR's Cityscape, and has been featured on The Moth Mainstage and Podcast. His humor book, I Wasn’t Kidding: How To Commit Suicide So They'll Never Forget It was published by Random House in the United States and the United Kingdom. Consequently his work can be found on remainder shelves spanning two continents. He is the creator and host of The Liar Show.

SARA SCHAEFER is a comedian, writer, blogger, podcaster, filmmaker, gardener, and crocheter. She gathered critical acclaim for her bi-weekly stage show, "Sara Schaefer is Obsessed With You," and has won a Webby Award and two Emmys as head blogger for Late Night With Jimmy Fallon. She is also the co-creator of the popular podcast "You Had To Be There" with comedian Nikki Glaser.

JOHN SELLERS has written for GQ, The New York Times, SPIN, TV Guide, Vulture, and an almost depressing number of other outlets. He is also the author of four books, including the recent snake-centric memoir The Old Man and The Swamp. He grew up in the suburbs of Grand Rapids, Michigan.

TOM SHILLUE has appeared on his own Comedy Central Special, on Late Night with Conan O'Brien, and in his own segment on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. He is a frequent host at The Moth and hosts his own monthly show, FunnyStory.Biz at UCBeast. His show "Supernatural" won a ECNY Award for Best Solo Show.

Here it is on the Facebooks for your optional RSVP'ing pleasure.

NEWS! That Has To Do With The State's Kevin Allison! And Other Stuff!

2011-11-04T15:43:00.002-04:00

Friday, November 4th, 2011

Hello, Friends--

I hope you've been having a beautiful first week of November. This month is pretty freaking special: Two shows--one in Brooklyn--plus I'm NaNoWriMo'ing and also Susan Miller says my hair looks great and I shouldn't change it until mid-December. So I think everything is going to be okay.

I want to remind y'all that advance tickets are available right here through Ticketweb for the one-off Union Hall edition of HIL on November 14th with Mike Albo, Sara Schaefer, Tom Shillue, Andy Christie, and John Sellers. Get at it! It's going to be a fabulous night.

I also want to inform you that a very special person has been added to an already special lineup for HIL's end-of-season show on November 30th. That person is MR. KEVIN ALLISON of The State! He is also, of course, the man behind the ever-popular Risk! live series and podcast. Super excited. The theme for November 30th is "How I Learned The Rules of Attraction: Stories about Internet Dating." Pretty sure it's going to be a doozy.

Can't wait to see you!
xoxo Blaise

How I Learned Hits Brooklyn in November with Mike Albo + More!

2011-10-30T14:53:00.001-04:00

Hot on the heels of October's phenomenally great show (photos coming soon), I am thrilled to announce that HIL hits Brooklyn's Union Hall on November 14th for one special night! (Mostly so that I can walk to the show and back again.) Check out this lineup. Not to be missed!

The How I Learned Series Presents...

A Special Night at Union Hall in Brooklyn
HOW I LEARNED YOU CAN'T GO HOME AGAIN:
STORIES ABOUT WHERE WE GREW UP

Featuring:
MIKE ALBO
(The Junket)
ANDY CHRISTIE
(The Liar Show)
SARA SCHAEFER
(You Had To Be There)
JOHN SELLERS
(The Old Man and The Swamp)
TOM SHILLUE
(The Moth)

Created, Produced + Hosted by:
BLAISE ALLYSEN KEARSLEY

PLUS trivia + giveaways + the usual How I Learned good times!

Monday, November 14th, 7:30 Doors
UNION HALL
702 Union Street + 5th Avenue, Brooklyn
$8 / Buy Advance Tickets

B, Q to 7th Avenue
2, 3 to Bergen Street
R to Union Street

***

Tonight We Grovel

2011-10-26T13:22:00.005-04:00

Wednesday, October 26th, 2011

Hope to see your sorry asses at the show tonight. Stories will be dark and funny and deep. And there will be free prizes, which always helps when you're groveling.

HOW I LEARNED TO SAY I'M SORRY
Featuring:
Elissa Schappell
(Vanity Fair)
Starlee Kine
(This American Life)
Sarah Brown
(Cringe)
Andy Ross
(Real Characters)
Janice Erlbaum
(Girlbomb)

Produced + Hosted by:
Blaise Allysen Kearsley

Wednesday, October 26th
8pm / Doors open at 7
HAPPY ENDING
302 Broome Street between Forsyth + Eldridge
J, M, Z, F to Delancey
B, D to Grand
FREE

MORE DETAILS...

HOW I LEARNED TO SAY I'M SORRY

2011-10-10T08:29:00.014-04:00

This month: stories about being bad, having to apologize, or never feeling one g.d. moment of regret. But probably not that last one. I am truly sorry I even said that.

***

The How I Learned Series Presents:
HOW I LEARNED TO SAY I'M SORRY

Featuring:
SARAH BROWN
(Cringe; McSweeney's)
JANICE ELRBAUM
(Girlbomb; Have You Found Her)
STARLEE KINE
(This American Life; New York Times Magazine)
ANDY ROSS
(Real Characters; TOLD)
ELISSA SCHAPPELL
(Vanity Fair; Use Me)

Created, Produced + Hosted by
BLAISE ALLYSEN KEARSLEY

Wednesday, October 26th
8pm / Doors open at 7
HAPPY ENDING
302 Broome Street between Forsyth + Eldridge
J, M, Z, F to Delancey
B, D to Grand
FREE

PLUS: Trivia + Special Giveaways!

***

SARAH BROWN is the creator and host of the Cringe reading series in both New York and London and the author of Cringe: Teenage Diaries, Journals, Notes, Letters, Poems, and Abandoned Rock Operas (Crown, 2008). She has been writing online for nearly a decade and her work has appeared in McSweeney's, Gawker, and The Morning News, as well as in numerous anthologies including Created in Darkness by Troubled Americans: The Best of McSweeney's Humor Category and Things I Learned About My Dad. Her personal blog, Que Sera Sera, has been around since 2001.

JANICE ERLBAUM is the author of Girlbomb: A Halfway Homeless Memoir (Villard, 2006), and Have You Found Her: A Memoir (Villard, 2008). A former columnist for BUST magazine, her poetry and prose has been featured in several anthologies and major magazines. She teaches writing, and is the Chairman of the Board of Bowery Arts + Science.

STARLEE KINE is a contributor to the public radio show This American Life. She is working on her first book, It IS Your Fault, essays about the self-help industry and it's, frankly, driving her crazy. If you are caught up on Breaking Bad, she basically feels like a smaller, less bald fourth season Walt, screaming his head off in his basement.

ANDY ROSS is a comedy writer and storyteller from Wisconsin. He's contributed to The Onion News Network, Comedy Central's Indecision Forever, and Mad Magazine. As a storyteller, Andy has performed on TOLD, Stripped Stories, The Liar Show, and the Moth GrandSLAM, among others. He runs a monthly storytelling/reading series called Real Characters at McNally Jackson Books in SoHo. For more Andy Ross visit andyrosscomedy.com.

ELISSA SCHAPPELL is the author of Blueprints for Building Better Girls and Use Me, which was a finalist for the PEN/Hemingway award, and a New York Times Notable Book. She is a contributing editor for Vanity Fair, co-founder and Editor-at-Large of Tin House, and co-editor with Jenny Offill of two anthologies, The Friend Who Got Away and Money Changes Everything. She teaches at NYU and lives in Brooklyn.

Here's the event on the Facebooks if you do that sort of thing.

Eyes of The Tigers

2011-10-06T22:53:00.010-04:00

Thursday, October 6th, 2011

So, we closed out September -- MY BIRTHDAY MONTH -- with stories about surviving. I think it was the first time at How I Learned that some people were brought to tears. And not from laughing. Although there was plenty of that too. Thank you to everyone who came out for the show and to the dream team lineup of the century.

Lots of things coming up on the horizon. I'll have you know I'm very excited. We have a show on October 26th with another dream team lineup of the century. (I know. Can you believe there's more than one?) Plus, not one, but TWO SHOWS in November. And one of them is in Brooklyn! And there's even more stuff to be announced after that!

So, more details on all of that starting tomorrow. Or maybe Monday. Not sure. It depends on how my life is going. But watch this space. Stay right here. Don't move. While you wait, here are photos by Mr. Jesse Chan-Norris, and a post-show wrap-up, from last month:

I love MELANIE HAMLETT. She is a nomadic storytelling superstar. This was her second time at How I Learned. (Her first was How I Learned to Live on The Road: Travels, Travails, Wanderlust + Out-of-Town Hijinks...) Her story was about how she survived her first date -- at the age of 33 -- and about realizing she has been the emotionally unavailable "guy" in all of her relationships. Also, one of the things that we learned from Melanie is that you can pack an overnight bag for a one-night-stand. Try and keep up with her, if you can, at melaniehamlett.com. As of this writing, I think she is in Portland right now occupying the shit out of it.

Photo: Jesse Chan-Norris

What can I say about ALEXANDER CHEE without going on and on? His story, I, Reader, for the beloved Morning News was just chosen as a Notable Essay in Best American Essays 2011, he is the author of Edinburgh and the highly anticipated forthcoming novel The Queen of The Night, and he has a great interview here in L Magazine about this g.d. economy and being a starving artist. For How I Learned, Alex read an excerpt from his personal essay, The Querent, and gave a trivia-question-winning audience member a 3-card Tarot reading at the bar after the show. He is highly quotable, I got drunk with him over a delicious Korean-themed dinner this summer, AND I spend a lot of time trying to hold back on "liking" his status updates. If I did not hold back, it would be a real problem. It is still kind of a problem. Did I go on and on?

Photo: Jesse Chan-Norris / Illustration: Lauren Nassef

I was so happy to have JOANNE SOLOMON back at HIL. She is a master storyteller, a Moth slam champion, and she has performed all over the city and beyond in shows like The Liar Show, Speakeasy, Steamboat and many, many others. She is also a professional aerialist, having performed for six years in De La Guarda. So it's not hard to believe that an aerialist has a Burning Man story to tell. Joanne told us how she learned to survive one year at Burning Man with her anti-social, non-English speaking Argentinian boyfriend. Alejandro: "It's too much. So much sand. Everyone is gay. I want to go home." Joanne: "Okay, I'm sorry. Let's go home. After the Tit Parade." Joanne also shared with us that she recently turned 40 and then almost immediately suffered a bike accident in which she broke her face. SURVIVING!

Photo: Jesse Chan-Norris

L.A.'s own JILLIAN LAUREN, author of the memoir Some Girls : My Life in a Harem, flew in to How I Learned in the middle of the tour for her novel Pretty, regaled us with her story about surviving her first night working at a strip club, which involved "an incorrectly pinned-on wig, a borrowed g-string and a thousand other humiliations," and then flew right back out leaving behind some Pretty swag, a memorable image of those shoes she was wearing (loved them), and the hope that she will come back again on her next book tour!

Photo: Jesse Chan-Norris

ED GAVAGAN. Where do I even begin? He had us in tears. Both kinds. And I'd been wanting him to do How I Learned for quite some time. He told a version of the story below, filmed at The Moth, about nearly dying and the fight for his life. Just watch and listen.

Photo: Jesse Chan-Norris

See what I mean? Also, as a trivia-giveaway-prize thing, Ed offered one lucky winner a free boxing lesson. Not sure how I'm going to top that next month. I have a stack of old magazines if anyone wants them.

Okay! That's all until tomorrow. Or maybe Monday. Monday, probably. Monday-ish. Thank you for your support, for coming to How I Learned, and for your obviously exquisite taste in culture and entertainment and hard-working, underpaid creator/producer/hostesses who just had a birthday.

See you soon!

xoxo Blaise

HOW I LEARNED TO SURVIVE

2011-09-18T22:01:00.003-04:00

This month's stories may or may not include useful information involving pooping in buckets, stripping, fortunetelling, getting stabbed and Oprah. JOIN US!

***

The How I Learned Series Presents:
HOW I LEARNED TO SURVIVE

Featuring:
ALEXANDER CHEE
(Edinburgh; Granta)
ED GAVAGAN
(The Liar Show; The Story Collider)
MELANIE HAMLETT
(RISK!; The Moth StorySLAM)
JILLIAN LAUREN
(Pretty; Some Girls: My Life in a Harem)
JOANNE SOLOMON
(Steamboat Humor Reading Series; De La Guarda)

Created, Produced + Hosted by
BLAISE ALLYSEN KEARSLEY

Wednesday, September 28th
8pm / Doors open at 7
HAPPY ENDING
302 Broome Street between Forsyth + Eldridge
J, M, Z, F to Delancey
B, D to Grand
FREE!

***

ALEXANDER CHEE is the author of the novels Edinburgh (Picador, 2002) and The Queen of the Night, forthcoming from Houghton Mifflin Harcourt. He is the recipient of a Whiting Writers' Award, an NEA Fellowship in Fiction and the Massachusetts Cultural Council, and residencies from the MacDowell Colony, Ledig House and Civiella Ranieri. He is a contributing writer at the Morning News, and has written for Granta, the Paris Review Daily and NPR.

For his day job, ED GAVAGAN designs and builds homes and furniture for fancy people and humble folk all over the world. His work has been featured on the cover of Elle Décor, in Architectural Digest, the New York Times, Architectural Record, Global Architecture and other periodicals and books worldwide. His storytelling has been featured in The Moth StorySLAM and mainstage events, and The Moth Story Hour on NPR. He has also been seen on The Liar Show, The Story Collider, Sideshow Goshko and anything he can do with Adam Wade. He is very happy to tell stories and even happier when people listen.

MELANIE HAMLETT is a writer, a 2-time Moth StorySLAM Champion and a nomad who divides her time between living in her truck on the road, on friends' couches in New York City, in a trailer with no running water in New Mexico, and out of a back pack in foreign countries. She's told stories in shows all over NYC, including ASSSCAT 3000 at the Upright Citizens' Brigade Theater, and on the podcasts Risk! and Broadcastr. Her next adventures will be in Argentina, where she'll be living for an undetermined period of time come December. Until then, she's happy to be back in New York where she won't have to crap in a bucket.

JILLIAN LAUREN is the author of the New York Times bestselling memoir, Some Girls: My Life in a Harem, published by Plume in April 2010. It has since been translated into fourteen different languages. Her novel, Pretty, was released on August 30, 2011. Her writing has appeared in the Paris Review Daily, the New York Times, Vanity Fair, Flaunt Magazine, Opium Magazine, Society, Pale House: A Collective and in the anthology My First Time: A Collection of First Punk Show Stories. She lives in Los Angeles with musician Scott Shriner and their son.

JOANNE SOLOMON is a writer turned aerialist who remains grateful to the New York storytelling and literary communities for giving her a home again after a six year run in De La Guarda. When Joanne is not teaching ESL at NYU, she's rehearsing for her solo piece, entitled Matambrito, where she attempts to organically morph her writing and aerial skills into a cohesive bit of theater (without using a flying animal as the main character). Other plans: 1.) Finish her collection of essays entitled Walking Mr. Lieberman; 2.) Buy that Murphy bed, which she believes will be the answer to all of her problems.

The Quagga Is My Spirit Animal

2011-09-13T14:52:00.003-04:00

Tuesday, September 12th, 2011

Hey, Remember June? On June 22nd there was a little show called How I Learned Who's Coming to Dinner: Stories About Race + Identity. It was all about melting pots, racist cab drivers, miscegenation, weird stalkers and intolerant dysfunctional families. You know, the usual How I Learned good times. There was almost a race riot in the line to the bathroom.

Here is some video footage for you to enjoy.

P.S. I have to give special thanks to Dodai Stewart. She came to How I Learned and introduced me to my true self, my animal spirit, my inner small brown horse with zebra stripes. The video below will explain everything. She should be a life coach for multiracial women everywhere.

Just Smile All the Time

2011-08-31T09:00:00.050-04:00

Wednesday, August 31st, 2011

Gah! It's the last day of August. How did that happen? Well, How I Learned To Fight Loneliness, the last show of the summer, offered valuable lessons learned from our esteemed lineup. Musings on hanging out in "old man bars," life as an only child, life as the middle fourth child, long and empty nights on the road (show biz!), and getting a gratuitous breast exam when your nurse is a Lenny Kravitz look-alike were among the true--and very helpful and informative--stories. I'm telling you, except for that one time I got a prescription for vicodin after I got four wisdom teeth taken out simultaneously and I watched all seven seasons of Buffy the Vampire Slayer in one sitting with maybe just a wee little glass of wine or two added to the extra vike 'round about season four while my then boyfriend was out in the midwest working on a pipeline, loneliness has never been so much fun! (Based on a true story.) So, thank you to Catie Lazarus, Ophira Eisenberg, D.E. Rasso, Connor Gaudet and Brian Grosz for a great show!

I have some videos to share with you. But before I do: Mark your calendars! September 28th! The topic is How I Learned To Survive and the lineup includes author Alexander Chee and storytellers Ed Gavagan, Melanie Hamlett and Joanne Solomon on real survival related issues like pooping in buckets, finding your inner tarot, and also getting stabbed. Again, should be very helpful and informative. Stay tuned for more details.

UPDATE: Jillian Lauren has just been added to the lineup, all the way from Los Angeles!

Now, from our very own YouTube channel, here's Brian Grosz telling his loneliness story (more clips from last week's show coming soon-ish), followed by Miss Martha Davis and The Motels' Only the Lonely. So good, both.

HOW I LEARNED TO FIGHT LONELINESS

2011-08-11T22:28:00.008-04:00

THIS is the night that will change all of our lives and nights and days forever. By the way, I got the idea for this topic from the Wilco song How to Fight Loneliness and NOT BECAUSE I KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT IT OR ANYTHING.

Okay! See you there!

xoxo Blaise

***

The How I Learned Series presents:

HOW I LEARNED TO FIGHT LONELINESS

Featuring:

OPHIRA EISENBERG
(The Moth)

CONNOR GAUDET
(Mr. Beller's Neighborhood)

BRIAN GROSZ
(Lapdance Academy)

CATIE LAZARUS
(Employee of the Month)

D.E. RASSO
(Love is a Four-Letter Word)

Created, Produced + Hosted by
BLAISE ALLYSEN KEARSLEY

Wednesday, August 24th
8pm / Doors at 7
HAPPY ENDING
302 Broome Street between Forsyth + Eldridge
J, M, Z, F to Delancey
B, D to Grand
FREE!

***

Selected as one of New York Magazine's Top 10 Comics, OPHIRA EISENBERG has appeared on Comedy Central, VH-1, Fox, E! Channel and The Joy Behar Show. Her writing has been published in five anthologies including I Killed: True Stories of the Road from America's Top Comics and Heeb Magazine's collection Sex, Drugs & Gefilte Fish. She is a monthly contributor to US Magazine's Fashion Police and a regular host for The Moth.

CONNOR GAUDET is a Brooklyn-based writer, passionately pursuing a life of debt and poverty, Diarist, embellisher and non-fiction storyteller, he occasionally comes clean at The Daily Hell. He is also Managing Editor of the non-fiction literary website Mr. Beller's Neighborhood.

With a "face for radio," BRIAN GROSZ works as a commercial voiceover artist for clients that have included Chase Bank, VH-1, Levitra, Major League Baseball, American Standard and Toyota. When he's not talking on television, Grosz is performing with his blues project, Brian Grosz and The Bad Idea, producing albums for his free-download record label, Lapdance Academy and blogging about tattoos at NeedlesAndSins.com.

CATIE LAZARUS is a writer and comedian. She hosts Employee of the Month, a talk show at the 92 Y Tribeca. She is also the co-creator of The On Time Show, and is delighted to be appearing on How I Learned.

D.E. RASSO is a writer and blogger who has spoken inexpertly on the topics of music criticism, the future of publishing, Internet impostors and weird things from dollar stores.

P.S. Here's the event on The Facebooks for your Facebooking pleasure.

Filmed in Front of a Live Studio Audience

2011-08-04T01:18:00.004-04:00

Thursday, August 4th, 2011

Here are photos from the last show. It was really fun, and if you missed it you should maybe talk to someone about it. I've probably said this before, and I don't want to psychoanalyze you, but it might be why you've been depressed lately.

How I Learned You Can't Do That on Television:

Stories About TV!

Photos: Jesse Chan-Norris

Here's LIZZ WINSTEAD. She's just the co-creator of The Daily Show, among other things. No big.

JON FRIEDMAN looks great in plaid. You probably know him from The Rejection Show, and Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, and HOW I LEARNED FROM TWO YEARS AGO! Also, you can buy his book! There is still time!

Here I am in what I like to call "my pregnant dress." I am not pregnant, thank god. Because you can't raise a child on Lara Bars and Campari.

This is Happy Ending's oft-pictured Table #7, for those of you keeping score at home.

Beautiful DIANA SPECHLER has published a second novel since we last saw her at How I Learned. There is Who By Fire, and there is Skinny, and I imagine you might want to go ahead and buy both of them.

Last, but least of all least, here is BEN LILLIE, co-founder of The Story Collider. He is also a Moth champion and a writer for TED. Yes, that TED--that thing that makes you say to yourself: Huh. Maybe I need to be doing something a little bit more phenomenal with my life. Maybe I need to be more The Secret-like.

Next Up:
8/24--How I Learned to Fight Loneliness
Featuring: Ophira Eisenberg, Catie Lazarus, Connor Gaudet, D.E. Rasso, and Brian Grosz
Stay tuned for more details...

Many, many thanks to last month's guests and to everyone who came out to see them!

xoxo Blaise

And When They Met It Was Murder

2011-07-25T08:26:00.003-04:00

Monday, July 25th, 2011

Last night, in pretty serious anticipation of this Wednesday's How I Learned You Can't Do That on Television: Stories About TV, I was sipping on some Campari inside my approximately 196-degree apartment and recalling my favorite television show intros of my formative years. I could have done it all night. By which I mean, I did do it all night. Some of these musical themes get me SO WORKED UP! (Do not even get me started on the ABC Sunday Night Movie theme from 1982.)

However, I'm trying not to be outraged that the YouTubes will not let me embed the Dukes of Hazzard or Dallas or Cosby Show Season 2 openings, and that NBC won't allow us to revel in the pure joy that is the intro to The Rockford Files. Because, I mean, COME ON.

Anyway, enjoy diving into my online retro TV vortex, as shown below.* And see you Wednesday at the show, which will not all be about me or television programming from days of yore! It will star The Daily Show co-creator Lizz Winstead, Late Night with Jimmy Fallon blogger Jon Friedman, author of Skinny Diana Spechler, and writer for TED--you know, TED--Ben Lillie. So awesome and exciting. How I Learned--It's like The Love Boat meets Welcome Back, Kotter.

...And the OUTRO!

** Not shown: Jake and The Fatman, Hardcastle and McCormick, Simon and Simon, Riptide, Oprah.

HOW I LEARNED YOU CAN'T DO THAT ON TELEVISION: STORIES ABOUT TV!

2011-07-20T13:54:00.003-04:00

Television! Growing up in front of it, fighting over it, grounded from it, addicted to it, being on it, writing for it, stealing it, streaming it, tossing it out of a hotel window into the swimming pool below. Get ready, TV lovers and kill-your-television types alike--July's How I Learned is primetime live! (Not sure what that means exactly, but I'm just trying to say this show is going to be amazing. Look at this lineup!) Also: Filmed in front of a live studio audience.

***

The How I Learned Series Presents:
HOW I LEARNED YOU CAN'T DO THAT ON TELEVISION:
STORIES ABOUT TV

Featuring:
LIZZ WINSTEAD
(The Daily Show; Air America)
JON FRIEDMAN
(Late Night with Jimmy Fallon; The Rejection Show)
DIANA SPECHLER
(Skinny; Who By Fire)
BEN LILLIE
(TED; The Story Collider)

Created, Produced + Hosted by
BLAISE ALLYSEN KEARSLEY

Wednesday, July 27th
8pm / Doors open at 7
HAPPY ENDING
302 Broome Street (between Forsyth + Eldridge)
J, M, Z, F to Delancey
B, D to Grand

FREE!

***

LIZZ WINSTEAD is the co-creator and former head writer of THE DAILY SHOW and co-founder of AIR AMERICA RADIO. Recently, Lizz wrote and produced an independent pilot of her Off-Broadway hit, WAKE UP WORLD, a scathing satire about Morning chat shows that Rachel Maddow called, "The funniest thing I have seen in years." Known as one of the top political satirists in America, her talents as a comedian and media visionary have been recognized by The New York Times, The Washington Post, and Entertainment Weekly's most Creative People issue. She is currently touring the country, doing weekly segments on The Joy Behar Show and MSNBC's The Ed Show, and working on a book of essays for Riverhead Press.

JON FRIEDMAN is a writer, comedian and producer who won two Creative Arts Emmy’s as an original blogger for LATE NIGHT WITH JIMMY FALLON. He is the creator/producer and host of the popular variety show, THE REJECTION SHOW, and has created, produced, and/or hosted many other unique live events, including The NYC BEARD AND MOUSTACHE CHAMPIONSHIPS, the ECNY AWARDS and THE DELICIOUS SANDWICH SOCIAL. Jon’s first book, the award winning REJECTED: TALES OF THE FAILED, DUMPED & CANCELED, a humor anthology of rejected works, was released in 2009 with Villard (Random House). He performs regularly at stand-up comedy venues and at literary events throughout New York City and beyond. His solo show, Bear With Me ran at The Upright Citizen’s Brigade Theater in New York and was nominated for a 2011 ECNY Award for Best One Person Show. You can follow Jon on Twitter at @friedmanjon.

DIANA SPECHLER is the author of the novels WHO BY FIRE (Harper Perennial, 2008) and SKINNY (Harper Perennial, 2011). She has written for The New York Times, GQ, O Magazine, Esquire, Self, Details, The Wall Street Journal online and elsewhere. She teaches writing in New York City and for Stanford University's Online Writing School.

BEN LILLIE is a high-energy particle physicist who left the ivory tower for the wilds of New York's theater district. He is co-founder and director of THE STORY COLLIDER, where people are invited to share their stories of how science has affected their lives. He is also a MOTH STORYSLAM champion, writes for TED.COM, and likes to say that life is different now, largely because it is.

This is going to be good. Hope to see you there!
xoxo Blaise

PS. It's on the Facebooks here for your optional RSVPing pleasure.

After These Messages We'll Be Right Back...

2011-07-14T23:43:00.001-04:00

Thursday, July 14, 2011

This month's show is going to be bananas. Just look at this image I made for it just now while I was having a(nother) glass of wine. I think it's pretty indicative of bananas.

Stay tuned for details, as well as some stuff about last month's awesome show, which I will get to eventually, okay?

Cheryl B.

2011-06-19T20:59:00.001-04:00

Sunday, June 19th, 2011

The lovely and kind Cheryl Burke--poet, storyteller, producer, and HIL alum--died yesterday. She was tough as nails and it never, ever occurred to me that she might not make it. She was wonderfully supportive of others and brilliantly courageous in her writing and in her life. She was not nearly done with this world, which makes it all the more devastating. As one of her friends said on her Facebook page, "Fuck you, cancer." Really.

Cheryl, thank you for everything. You will be missed always.

HOW I LEARNED WHO'S COMING TO DINNER: STORIES ABOUT RACE + IDENTITY

2011-06-14T01:48:00.001-04:00

This is going to be totally educational in a hilarious yet poignant and also maybe slightly offensive sort of way if you want me to be perfectly honest with you. Up with people!

***

The How I Learned Series Proudly Presents:
HOW I LEARNED WHO'S COMING TO DINNER:
STORIES ABOUT RACE + IDENTITY

Featuring:
VICTOR VARNADO
(Tell Your Friends!; Comedy Central)
DODAI STEWART
(Jezebel.com; Glamour)
EUGENE ASHTON-GONZALEZ
(The Moth; New York Confidential Storytelling Series)
LESLIE GOSHKO
(Vodka Shoes; Manhattan Monologue Slam Champion)
ALYSSA PINSKER
(New York Post; Bust Magazine)

Created, Produced + Hosted by
BLAISE ALLYSEN KEARSLEY

Wednesday, June 22nd
8pm / Doors open at 7
HAPPY ENDING
302 Broome Street (between Forsyth + Eldridge)
J, M, Z, F to Delancey
B, D to Grand

FREE!

***

VICTOR VARNADO has navigated the adversities of being born a legally blind, African-American albino to become a nationally known actor, comedian, director, and, according to legend, a Jedi. You may recognize him from TV appearances on Late Night with Conan O’Brien, Comedy Central, Jimmy Kimmel Live, Adult Swim and My Name is Earl, and in the films End of Days, A Guy Thing, and Julien Donkey Boy. He most recently directed the live concert film Tell Your Friends! You can visit him at www.bestalbino.com.

DODAI STEWART was born in the South and raised in New York. She started writing stories at the age of 4, attended Bronx High School of Science, and was a screenwriting major at Tisch School of the Arts. She is currently the Deputy Editor of Jezebel, and has also written for Glamour, Ladies Home Journal, New York Magazine, Jane, and Entertainment Weekly, among others. She lives on the Lower East Side of Manhattan but dreams of retiring on a chihuahua farm in the South Pacific. [Photo: Nikola Tamindzic]

LESLIE GOSHKO is a Manhattan Monologue Slam Champion, recipient of the NY Fringe Excellence Award, and host of the monthly storytelling series, “Sideshow Goshko” (Time Out NY "Critics' Pick", New York Daily News “Editor’s Pick”). Her stories and comedy writing have been featured on Sirius XM, WNYC, NY Metro "Funny Page", Risk! podcast, and she can be seen performing with NY's hardest-drinking improvised storytelling rock band -- The BTK Band. Her one-woman show, Vodka Shoes, opened to rave reviews as part of the NY Frigid Festival and was awarded several extended runs. She's also pretty proud to have performed on Broadway with the cast of Hairspray. [Photo: Mindy Tucker]

EUGENE ASHTON-GONZALEZ is a writer and comedian. He is the host and creator of New York Confidential, a real dirty storytelling series running at a hush-house near you. As a ghostwriter he has worked on projects about bank bailouts, the Iraq War, and Beyonce. He makes stories all over town, and on the world wide web at www.ashtongonzalez.com.

As the child of a Yeshiva fleeing Bronx bred dad and anti-religious Ukranian Catholic immigrant scenesters ALYSSA PINSKER has dated hipster Hassids, turbaned Sikhs, skirt-wearing Keralite Muslims, WASPS and Jews. She's the post-modern Jukrainian yogi herself. She is currently working on an anti-Eat, Pray, Love memoir, and has written for the Huffington Post, Time Out NY, New York Post, The Daily News, Bust Magazine, The Frisky, The Forward, Generation J, and Interfaith Family. She has also appeared in The Moth StorySLAM and New York Confidential.

This is really going to be something. I am pretty sure all bets are off. Facebook event is here for your optional RSVPing pleasure.
See you soon!
xoxo Blaise

Sex Stuff: More Catching Up with Photos

2011-06-06T19:07:00.006-04:00

Monday, June 6th, 2011

How I Learned About Sex (Volume II)

Photos by Jesse Chan-Norris


SHAWN HOLLENBACH shares his childhood world of unicorns. This one unicorn is a rainbow maker!


The adorably befreckled Miss MICHELE CARLO reads from her memoir Fish Out of Agua.


Ladies laughing. That's what I like to see.

MR. PAUL FORD in his second HIL appearance. What can I say? The man knows how to tell a story.


More ladies laughing!

RACHEL SHERMAN didn't even know her story would be funny. It was very funny.

BEN LERMAN singing about a town called Bonerville.


BETSY PEPSII MAHER at the bar. She's the best.

We have fun! The end. (That's all I got.) See you June 27th for an all-new topic! You guys, that's right around the corner.

xoxo Blaise

Catching Up With Photos!

2011-06-02T22:18:00.003-04:00

Wednesday June 1st, 2011

How I Learned It's Not Me, It's You (Or Maybe It's Me)

Photos by Jon Boulier

This show, waaaay back in April, was such a gas. The brilliant SAM LIPSYTE even applauded it from the stage.

ANDREA ROSEN is one of my fave comics. I've told her as much, and in such a way that may have got her thinking I might sometimes engage in some low grade stalking behavior.

Here I am using air quotes without irony.

ELISSA BASSIST reminded us all it's not a How I Learned show until someone references their own jungle town vagina.

JIM O'GRADY killed with a true story about a Leonard Lopate mishap. O'Grady is a serious storyteller. A champ. A whiz. A pro. This was such a stellar lineup--one that dreams are made of!

Aw, we have fun.

Don't go anywhere. Stay tuned for details about the summer edition of How I Learned on June 22nd! To get on the mailing list email howilearned at gmail dot com or search for How I Learned on the Facebooks because I'm too tired to post the link here.

xoxo Blaise

After The Rapture We'll All Have a Cigarette

2011-05-17T23:35:00.008-04:00

HOW I LEARNED ABOUT SEX (VOLUME II)

Featuring:
RACHEL SHERMAN
(Living Room, The First Hurt)
PAUL FORD
(Gary Benchley, Rock Star; Harper's)
BEN LERMAN
(Logo TV, Here TV)
MICHELE CARLO
(Fish Out of Agua; The Moth)
SHAWN HOLLENBACH
(Closet Cases; Hot Gay Comics)

Created, Produced + Hosted by
BLAISE ALLYSEN KEARSLEY

Wednesday, May 25th (4 days post-Rapture)
8pm / Doors open at 7
HAPPY ENDING
302 Broome Street (between Forsyth + Eldridge)
J, M, Z, F to Delancey
B, D to Grand

FREE!

***

RACHEL SHERMAN's first book, The First Hurt, was short-listed for the Story Prize and the Frank O'Connor International Short Story Award, and was named one of the 25 books to remember in 2006 by the New York Public Library. The New York Times Book Review called her most recent novel, The Living Room, "perfectly paced." She teaches writing at Rutgers and Columbia, and she lives in Brooklyn.

PAUL FORD is a writer and nerd who lives in Brooklyn. He published the novel Gary Benchley, Rock Star in 2005, used to be an editor at Harper's Magazine, and has a blog he doesn't update very often called Ftrain.com.

If Flight of the Conchords and Zach Galifianakis had a lovechild with David Sedaris, it would be BEN LERMAN. He has appeared on Logo TV and Here! TV, and he is a regular contributor on SiriusXM Satellite Radio. Ben was just nominated for an Excellence in Comedy in New York Award for Best Musical Comedy Act. His debut music video landed him in the "Lowbrow/Brilliant" quadrant of the New York Magazine Approval Matrix. Check it out at benlerman.net.

MICHELE CARLO is a writer/performer who has lived in four of the five boroughs of NYC and remembers when a slice of pizza cost fifty cents. She has been published in Thomas Beller's Lost & Found: Stories from New York and SMITH magazine. She has told her stories everywhere a person can tell stories in New York--including The Moth's GrandSLAM and Mainstage and the PEN American Center World Voices Festival. Her memoir Fish Out Of Agua was published by Citadel Press in 2010. Visit michelecarlo.com

SHAWN HOLLENBACH is a stand up comedian, actor, and the gay next door. He is the producer of Closet Cases, a Critics' Pick in Time Out NY and a Homo Must in HX Magazine. You may have seen him on VH1 or Gayest Week Ever or Hot Gay Comics. He is the creator and co-producer of the Miss Fag Hag Pageant featuring such talents as Caroline Rhea, John Cameron Mitchell, Michael Musto, and Hedda Lettuce. Shawn is also a contributing writer for 365gay.com.

Ben Lerman

Rachel Sherman

Michele Carlo

Shawn Hollenbach

Dr. Ruth*

Paul Ford

*Not actually appearing, but there in spirit probably.

Monday Stuff About Love Mostly

2011-05-02T12:10:00.001-04:00

Monday, May 2nd, 2011

Happy Month of May, Children. Let's make it a good one.

First, I just want to say how much fun Wednesday's show was, and I want to thank everyone who came out. Man, I'm a lucky girl. Photos and other stuff from last week coming soon, but, in the meantime, I wanted to highlight some HIL alumni activity in the meantime...

Well, every knows by now that JENNIFER EGAN has pretty much won every award known to man for her latest A Visit From the Goon Squad, and for just being an amazing writer and person in general, and for having the best cheekbones. Okay, she is not an HIL alum per se YET. But we've emailed back and forth and it is going to happen. Allegedly. I can feel it. She will do my show. Man, I love her. I am probably also going to ask her if she'll adopt me. More on that later.

ANDREA ROSEN's one woman show called--what else?--Ding Dong Meow, is back at UCB this Friday. Check it.

DIANA SPECHLER is celebrating her book launch tonight at Book Court in Cobble Hill. She is embarking on a tour for her new novel, Skinny. Check her web area for details.

And thank god that MIKE ALBO is bringing Unitard back to la stage on May 7th at Joe's Pub.

Oh, and listen: BETSY MAHER, superbartender at Happy Ending is officially a business owner. She's opening a new bar in Brooklyn. Stay tuned for details because you are probably going to want to be first in line when it opens.

Okay, that's it for now. I love you, HIL people. Back to work.
xoxo Blaise

THIS WEDNESDAY!

2011-04-26T17:01:00.002-04:00

Tuesday, April 26th, 2011

I'm so excited about tomorrow's show, I can't shut up about it. I know. It's annoying. But you will thank me later. Also, it's been recommended by Time Out's books section as one of the Best Five Things you can do this week! (We share the page with the inimitable John Waters. It's a match made in heaven.)

Looking forward to seeing you!
xo Blaise

HOW I LEARNED IT'S NOT ME, IT'S YOU
(OR MAYBE IT'S ME)
Wednesday, April 27th, 8PM
Featuring: SAM LIPSYTE, ANDREA ROSEN, JIM O'GRADY + ELISSA BASSIST
PLUS: Special giveaways and trivia stuff.
As always, it's free and it's at Happy Ending!
FULL DETAILS HERE

Dear World Wide Online Universe...

2011-04-25T11:35:00.005-04:00

Monday, April 25th, 2011

Hello. Happy Monday? Here are some PRESS THINGS I wanted to make a page about. Thank you, L Magazine, The Ticker, Flavorpill, and, of course, Time Out New York! There's more, but I don't want to brag because it's rude. I think if you click on the photos below, and then zoom in, you should be able to embiggen the shit out of them. (And also, don't forget that by this Wednesday, you'll be having the best week ever!)

L Magazine with HIL alum and The Rejection Show's Jon Friedman!

Today the Baruch College newspaper, tomorrow another college newspaper.

Nice feature with HIL alumni Julie Klausner, Justin Taylor, Stefan Merrill Block and Daniel Nester

TONY's blog's last-minute plan. Craig Baldo is pictured.

How I Learned on La Flavorpill

Thank you, Time Out, for liking me, for really liking me. Or, I guess, my show.

Also these:

"The Getting of Wisdom is a more or less eternal narrative structure, hence this monthly reading series, at which writers and comedians hold forth on aspects of their respective bildungen." - L Magazine

"The stories were captivating, the audience responsive, the air positively tingling. I hadn’t had this much fun in – or at – a story event in ages. " - Tracy Rowland, The Liar Show

"An evening of pure genius from start to finish." - Sibyl Kempson, The Secret Death of Puppets

"I just felt really inspired this fall after performing on your show and then doing my one-woman-show and being so open and pathetically honest. It feels good!" - Brooke Van Poppelen, Rock Bottom Stories

"It's laugh therapy!" - Nice woman standing outside at one of the readings, waiting to get in, and her high heels were killing her

"Your show is good." - Mr. Dave Hill, davehillonline.com

HOW I LEARNED IT'S NOT ME, IT'S YOU (OR MAYBE IT'S ME)

2011-04-06T15:46:00.001-04:00

Hi! I'll cut right to the chase. You're welcome.

The How I Learned Series is Insanely Excited to Present:

HOW I LEARNED
IT'S NOT ME, IT'S YOU
(OR MAYBE IT'S ME)
Featuring:

SAM LIPSYTE
(The Ask; Home Land)
ANDREA ROSEN
(Stella; Variety Shac)
ELISSA BASSIST
(The Rumpus; Literary Death Match)
JIM O'GRADY
(This American Life; The Moth)

Created, Produced + Hosted by
BLAISE ALLYSEN KEARSLEY

Wednesday, April 27th
8pm / Doors open at 7
HAPPY ENDING
302 Broome Street (between Forsyth + Eldridge)
J, M, Z, F to Delancey
B, D to Grand

FREE!

***

Photo: Ceridwen Morris

SAM LIPSYTE is the author of one story collection and two other novels, including Home Land, which was a New York Times Notable Book and received the first annual Believer Book Award.

ANDREA ROSEN is a comic, actor, and writer. She is a member of Variety Shac, a monthly show at UCB NY, and was regular on Comedy Central's Michael and Michael Have Issues. She has also appeared in Flight of the Conchords, Rescue Me, The Whitest Kids You Know, and Stella. She is a regular commentator on VH1, and does lots of commercials. Andrea holds a women's fishing world record, having caught the biggest Permit fish on an 8-pound test line.

ELISSA BASSIST co-edited Rumpus Women, Volume I, the first and most extraordinary anthology ever published by TheRumpus.net. She edits Funny Women, a humor column on the The Rumpus. Her essay "A Baker's Dozen of My Feelings about Infinite Jest" appears in Best of the Web 2010. Her self-help book, The Power of Negative Thinking, will be written soon. Peruse elissabassist.com for a lot of literary, feminist, and personal criticism.

JIM O'GRADY has worked as a reporter for The New York Times, professor of journalism at NYU, and research director at The Center for an Urban Future, a policy think tank. He is now a reporter for WNYC Radio. He has won eight Moth storyslams and a Moth GrandSLAM, and has told a story on This American Life. He has a message for all you hatahs out there... but forgets what it is.

In related news: This is going to be so good. I. Can't. Wait.
Hope to see youse there!
xoxo Blaise

Cómo Aprendí (I Think That Means 'How I Learned' in Spanish)

2011-03-28T20:45:00.002-04:00

Monday, March 28th, 2011

Hi! Usually, I have photos to share with you in the post-show blog post, but this time I don't. My official photographer had some sort of beef taco emergency. He's fine.

BUT!

Please imagine, from last week's How I Learned To Fight Back!: A photo of author JAMI ATTENBERG recounting the time that she plotted a sting to retrieve her beloved stolen bicycle. In this photo, her bangs look excellent.

Now imagine there's a photo of writer and comedian MR. BOB POWERS addressing the audience as the head of a neighborhood crime watch association. I forget the name of the neighborhood. It may have had the word Pine in it as well as Oak and also Bluff, but I'm not sure.

Now pretend there is a photograph of storyteller and aerialist JOANNE SOLOMON. She is reading from a piece of paper about how an ex-boyfriend's ex-girlfriend beat her up in a bathroom in Milan, while Joanne translated for her. Joanne is, like, a million times lovelier than that sentence makes her sound.

That picture is followed by this picture: A photo of CYNTHIA KAPLAN, in her second How I Learned appearance, playing an original song on her acoustic guitar. The song was called Letter From Dr. Randall Berkhauser. I was supposed to mention to the audience that she had with her for the taking copies of her CD, FANGRY. Since she is most likely not in the room with you this very moment and can't just hand you a CD, mentioning this now doesn't really help. Maybe she'll be in the room with you later.

Here you could envision a photo of me talking into the microphone and forgetting to mention Cynthia's CDs. I look pretty tired because I was in Central America the night before and it took me 20 hours to get back to New York. I'm smiling, though, because the show is fun. And I'm drunk. Also, I am wearing a t-shirt that says "Nothing To Prove," but I'm wearing it inside out.

Finally, pretend I've posted a wide shot of the audience really enjoying themselves! Which they did! And everyone is GORGEOUS! You can be in a photograph just like this one if you come to the next How I Learned. It is going to be so fantastic. I can't even believe the lineup myself....

...Mark your calendars. April 27th. The topic is How I Learned It's Not Me, It's You (Or, Maybe It's Me), featuring SAM LIPSYTE (WHAT!), ANDREA ROSEN (I KNOW!), ELISSA BASSIST (SERIOUSLY?) and JIM O'GRADY (OH, MAN!).

I can't wait. I might faint. Stay tuned for details....

Thanks, as always, to everyone who made--and continues to make--How I Learned totally super.
xo Blaise

HOW I LEARNED TO FIGHT BACK!

2011-03-09T10:12:00.008-05:00

Hello. This month's How I Learned offers stories about revenge, guts, balls, superheroism, or just plain sticking up for oneself or someone else's self. (Also, maybe a rumble with full-on knife fighting and snappy choreography.) Lock and load, bitches!

The How I Learned Series presents:
HOW I LEARNED TO FIGHT BACK!

Featuring:
BOB POWERS
(Happy Cruelty Day!; You Are a Miserable Excuse for a Hero)
CYNTHIA KAPLAN
(Why I'm Like This; The Cynthia Kaplan Ordeal)
JOANNE SOLOMON
(The Moth; De La Guarda)
JAMI ATTENBERG
(The Melting Season; Instant Love)

Hosted by BLAISE ALLYSEN KEARSLEY

Wednesday, March 23rd
8PM / Doors at 7
HAPPY ENDING
302 Broome Street
Between Forsythe + Eldridge
J, M, Z, F to Delancey
B, D to Grand
Directions
FREE!

***

BOB POWERS is the author of four humor books, including Happy Cruelty Day! and You Are A Miserable Excuse For A Hero. He has appeared on NPR's "All Things Considered" and Comedycentral.com's "Clip Joint." He is the host and producer of the Steamboat Humor Readings series in Ft. Greene. Bob writes often at his blog girlsarepretty.com.

JOANNE SOLOMON is a writer turned aerialist who remains grateful to the storytelling and literary communities for giving her a home again after a six year run in De La Guarda. When Joanne is not teaching ESL at NYU, she's rehearsing for her solo piece, entitled Matambrito, where she attempts to organically morph her writing and aerial skills into a cohesive bit of theater (without using a flying animal as the main character). Other plans: 1) finish her collection of essays entitled, Walking Mr. Lieberman; 2) buy that Murphy bed, which she believes will be the answer to all of her problems.

CYNTHIA KAPLAN is the author of Why I'm Like This and Leave the Building Quickly, and her comic essays have been published in many newspapers, magazines, journals, and anthologies. She has performed throughout the U.S. and just released her debut album of comedy rock songs, entitled FANGRY, with her band, The Cynthia Kaplan Ordeal. She has appeared in many plays and some movies, including Codependent Lesbian Space Alien Seeks Same, which appeared at this year's Sundance Film Festival. She can be reached at cynthiakaplan.com or you can just go right up to her and say something.

JAMI ATTENBERG is the author of Instant Love, The Kept Man, and The Melting Season, which was just released in paperback. Her new novel, The Middlesteins, will be published in 2012. Visit her online at whatever-whenever.net.

Plus, He's French.

2011-03-04T14:07:00.003-05:00

Friday, March 4th, 2011

Photo: Jon Boulier

Does you daughter need a date to the semi-formal? Do you need to hire a chaperone for spring break in Cancun? Or maybe you just need something for yourself or for your business. Maybe you need a photographer. Or maybe you need someone to design your website. Or your fliers. Or your business cards. Or your logo.

Well, my friend Jon Boulier does a lot of stuff for How I Learned, like taking awesome photos and designing t-shirts. (Yes! We are going to have T-SHIRTS. Someday.) He does this all pro boner to support How I Learned because we are pals, and also because How I Learned is a free show without a budget, except for what's inside my wallet, which, last I checked, was a twenty and a receipt from the pharmacy, plus 9 K-Mart Olan Mills studio portraits of my friend Sarah. (Those are worth a lot, but I will never sell them.)

My point is, you should hire Jon for something because I can't afford to pay him in real money. I pay him in one-of-a-kind How I Learned bank notes. Whatever the job is, he can probably do it. He likes pizza and cats. Here's his website. Thanks!

Feeling Feelings

2011-03-01T16:54:00.009-05:00

Tuesday, March 1st, 2011

Dear Everyone:

The last so-good-it's-not-to-be-believed HIL show was on February 23rd. It feels so long ago considering the levels of my distractibility, my frazzled self, my rapidly advancing age..., that I can barely remember most of it. Also: Vodka. So here are some super fun photos taken by JON BOULIER. The theme was How I Learned There Might Be Some Issues: Stories About Therapy. Thank you to everyone who came to the show! Another packed house! (POLL: Raise your hand if you think How I Learned has outgrown the beloved Happy Ending space-wise.)

MISS JIJI LEE, writer and creator of the new web series Cooking for One, on "how my severe cystic acne led me to a path of holistic therapy and self help." Yusssss!


ELIOT GLAZER letting loose on an insane psychotherapist he went to a couple of years ago. Bonus: He read some of her scathing reviews on RateMyDoctor.com. Double Bonus: A woman in the audience WENT TO THE SAME CRAZY THERAPIST! (Here's just some of what Eliot shared with us... with visuals.)

Storyteller supreme often seen in The Liar Show and in The Moth, TRACY ROWLAND tells a story about her battle against Joe The Life Coach for her ex-boyfriend's soul. (Evidently, the Life Coach never loses.)

Auteur AMY SOHN, at times using one of the cutest bad faux German accents ever performed under the How I Learned hot lights, talks about the shrink she once had who also purportedly treated "the most famous client in all of analytic history" Why, yes--she does mean Woody Allen.

Here is a pretty serious conversation about FEELINGS.

That is SARAH BROWN I'm talking to. She is the woman behind Cringe. She gets my eternal gratitude not only for the existence of all things Cringe, but because when Happy Ending was on the hunt for someone to pitch an idea for a new monthly series SB sent them directly to moi. What more can I say.

FIRST-TIMERS! At How I Learned, I mean. Gorgeous.

This is audience member BRIANNA winning a prize that I didn't actually have on me.


This is BRIAN, longtime HIL supporter. For telling an impromptu story about how his therapist laughed at him for accidentally burning his own mother's nether regions with Dr. Bronner's (it sounds more lude than it actually was), Brian won some How I Learned currency: a one-of-a-kind HIL $10,000 bank note which he can try to use to pay his next therapist.

More photos on the Facebooks. Enjoy.

xoxo Blaise

NANCY

***

Next Up:

Wednesday, March 23rd

HOW I LEARNED TO FIGHT BACK

Stories about revenge, bravery, or just plain sticking up for oneself or someone else. Also, maybe a rumble with full-on knife fighting.

BOB POWERS
(Girls Are Pretty; Steamboat Series)
JOANNE SOLOMON
(The Moth; De La Guarda)
JAMI ATTENBERG
(The Melting Season; Instant Love)
CYNTHIA KAPLAN
(Why I'm Like This; The Cynthia Kaplan Ordeal)

More details soon... Hope to see you there!

Your Prescription Is Ready

2011-02-21T19:30:00.008-05:00

Monday, February 21, 2011

Allison: ...I’m a nymphomaniac.
Claire: Lie.
Brian: Are your parents aware of this?
Allison: The only person I told was my shrink.
Andrew: And what did he do when you told him?
Allison: He nailed me.
-The Breakfast Club (Naturally.)

THIS WEDNESDAY!

HOW I LEARNED THERE MIGHT BE SOME ISSUES: STORIES ABOUT THERAPY
Happy Ending, 8pm (Full Details... )

See you then. Don't miss it. Because in therapy they call that "resistance."

All My Stuff is Ghostwritten*

2011-02-11T17:38:00.020-05:00

Friday, February 11th, 2011

In anticipation of last month's topic, How I Learned I Was Basically in Love With You, my boyfriend asked me if I was going to tell the story of how we fell in love. I was like, "Pffft, no! Who reads at their own series? That's so self-indulgent! This show isn't about me!" But I knew it was really important to him when he wrote this piece for me and handed it to me right before the show, delicately suggesting in this super-insistent way that I read it as my opener.

If you missed it, here it is, as written by my boyfriend, copied and pasted for your enjoyment. I'm sure he will be pleased to see his very own words on the world wide web for the rest of eternity. (Please note that any typos and grammatical errors are his.) Happy Valentine's Day, Babe!

Hi. I'm Blaise. Thank you for coming tonight to my wonderful show, part of a series of which I'm not only the founder, but the producer, curator, and host as well. Also, I created it.

Here is the story about me and my boyfriend, which definitely fits tonight's topic and should take 10 minutes or less to tell:

We met at a month-long international artists' residency in Northern Vermont in 2009. I was there for writing--something I am incredible at--and Andrew was there as a visual artist. [Could you please mention the URL of my website here, and spell it.] We met the very first night we arrived. Andrew thought, Who is this gorgeous girl? I want to spend time with her. But for the next two weeks I basically tried my best to stay away from him and not think about him at all, which I did not do very well. Also, doing that was ridiculous because Andrew is an amazing person. Second only to me on the scale of amazing persons.

One night, halfway through the residency, I did a reading in the old Town Hall and pretty much blew the roof off the place with a poignant and incredibly sexy personal essay about masturbating with stuffed animals. After all the applause and accolades, a bunch of us went out to celebrate at the one bar in town called The Hub. It was a special Tuesday at The Hub: $2 beers and "Reggae Night." Needless to say, the incredible trifecta of reggae, cheap ale, and a childhood history of violating stuffed animals three ways from Sunday was all it took to seal the deal. Andrew and I spent our first night together.

He didn't actually stick it in that night. He was in no rush; he wanted to wait until the time was right to make sure this wasn't some dead-end fling, and I was content to follow his lead, however long it took. The next night, he stuck it in. He'd never been so happy.

The truth is, even though I was interested in him from day one, I'd decided that I shouldn't be anybody's girlfriend for a while because of my debaucherous past. (Not just with stuffed animals, but with real living people. A lot of people.) And I never figured he'd be interested in me. Fortunately, I was able to let all of that go. It's a good thing because it turned out that I was just the kind of girl that he'd always wanted--his dream girl, pretty much--ever since he started liking girls at the age of 11 months, or earlier.

At the end of the month, when the program was over, he and I went back to Brooklyn--together. We'd been living in the same borough for over a decade. It's funny to think that in order to find each other we had to travel 8 hours north of the city after paying a non-refundable fee to apply to a pretty competitive program, and actually get accepted, which, frankly, was not as much of a sure thing for him as it was for me. My father attended the same program several times so I had nepotism going for me.

It's also funny to think that I spent considerable time and energy trying not to fall in love with Andrew right from the start. Looking back, I now realize it was already too late.

Thank You.

NOTE: Babe, So this is what I think you should read at your show--the best storytelling series in New York City. I know it's the best because I'm at Happy Ending every 4th Wednesday of the month at 8pm except for the 3 times I couldn't be there for stupid reasons I can't even recall now. I bet you did a great job just like you do at every show. That's all. I'll be standing in the front row when you're done.

With all my love and basically full on in-loveness,

Andrew

PS. You're so hot I can't believe I get to have sex with you.

(* Fine, I wrote this.)

Ain't Talking 'Bout Love

2011-02-09T18:41:00.004-05:00

Wednesday, February 9th, 2011

Seeking refuge from the Hallmark valentine choke hold of February? Well, this month How I Learned is all about mental health!

I know what you're thinking: Wait, how is that any different than any other How I Learned show? Good question.

This show is not only about mental issues, it's about the crazy professionals who take our hard-earned dollars to try and help us come to terms with those issues and sometimes try to basically brainwash us and then what we find is that we're broke and we still have the original problems plus new ones on top of it and also we're really pissed at our therapist who might actually be the real crazy one, and we're sick of them asking us "how do you feel about that" all the time. I feel how I feel, lady! Also, being late to a session isn't "resistance," it's just being late!

ANYWAY. This show is going to be so good.

HOW I LEARNED THERE MIGHT BE SOME ISSUES: STORIES ABOUT THERAPY

2011-02-09T17:36:00.006-05:00

Join us for stories of insane psychotherapists and life or death battles with new age life coaches. We're coming to terms with various things. Together. It will be like a mental health support group but with copious amounts of alcohol. Which is always a good sign.

The How I Learned Series presents...

HOW I LEARNED THERE MIGHT BE SOME ISSUES:
STORIES ABOUT THERAPY

Featuring:
AMY SOHN
(Prospect Park West)
ELIOT GLAZER
(My Parents Were Awesome)

JIJI LEE

(Cooking For One)

TRACY ROWLAND
(The Liar Show)

Created, Produced + Hosted by
BLAISE ALLYSEN KEARSLEY

Wednesday, February 23rd
8pm / Doors open at 7pm
HAPPY ENDING
302 Broome Street between Forsyth + Eldridge
J, M, Z, F to Delancey
B, D to Grand
FREE!

***

AMY SOHN is the author of the novels Prospect Park West, Run Catch Kiss, and My Old Man, all published by Simon & Schuster. She is currently writing a sequel to Prospect Park West, to be published in 2012. She has been a columnist for New York Press, The New York Post and New York magazine. As a television writer, she has penned pilots for such networks as ABC, Fox, Lifetime and HBO. “Avenue Amy,” which Ms. Sohn co-created, wrote and starred in, was one of the first original series on Oxygen. A graduate of Brown University, she lives in Brooklyn with her husband and young daughter.

ELIOT GLAZER is a writer, comedian, and blogger. He is an editor at Urlesque.com, and the creator of the blog My Parents Were Awesome, which will be released as an anthology of essays in April 2011 by Random House. More of his "mind garbage" can be found at eliotglazer.com.

JIJI LEE is the writer/creator of Cooking for One, a web series that celebrates yourself and all your mistakes. She has written for The New Republic, MAR magazine, and Refinery29. She graduated from Barnard College and still owes them a lot of money.

TRACY ROWLAND is that rare New Yorker who likes to talk. Except she's from New Jersey, which makes her rarer still. She has appeared onstage with The Moth, The Liar Show and the notorious BTK Band. Tracy makes her living as a promotion and marketing editor and is responsible for that Dateline promo involving 50-year-olds who want to hook up with your teenage daughter. She's got a one-eyed cat, a passport and a knack for physical injury. The stories write themselves. Also, she won an Emmy.

Here's the show on The Facebooks for your optional RSVPing pleasure.

Love Actually

2011-01-31T21:23:00.014-05:00

Monday, January 31st, 2011

WELL. As you may have heard How I Learned turned TWO last week. To help celebrate Maggie Estep, James Hannaham, Ryan Britt, and Amy Shapiro held forth on the theme How I Learned I Was Basically in Love With You, and special musical guest members of Lloyd United, played a ukelele and percuss version of Duran Duran's "Rio." Wait. What? I know! The night was wet and slushy and it was fixing to blizzard but you people still packed the room. Thank you, you people. I am basically in love with all of you.

Here are photos from last week. They were taken by the great Jon Boulier. We're off to a great season. Everything is great.

MR. RYAN BRITT. He appears on stahge regularly in storytelling shows all across this crazy city. Here he almost looks like a cross between Jonathan Ames and my boyfriend's best friend who lives in Athens, Georgia but none of that has anything to do with anything.

I stood at the ready holding AMY SHAPIRO's cocktails while she read her ode to booze. See her comedy show AKA Pants every 2nd Tuesday at Parkside Lounge.

I told you when I invited you that there might be party hats.

We won this book by Maggie Estep! And we love our glasses and our hats!

The amazing MAGGIE ESTEP. Wish I had a drink ticket for every girl who told me Maggie changed their life.

CUTE.

Half of this table was Hats Only. Cheers!


I don't know, I just like it.

Those two again.

He's looking at his special one-of-a-kind party favor! HE LOVES IT! Also, he was really into the hat.

More cuteness. But they weren't into the hats so much.

God Says No auteur JAMES HANNAHAM. Oh, man. I am definitely basically in love with him.

This is Lloyd of LLOYD UNITED, one part pop ukulele outfit, one part hooligan prog rock experience and one part beer-soaked Irish drinking song mob. Just out of frame is a dude on percussion. His name is Dave.

They. Are. Loving. It. And not only because they happen to be friends of mine.

They wore the party hats and blew the whistle-horn-whizzer things. I don't know who they are but I'm pretty into their enthusiasm.

PS. Come back 2/23 for How I Learned There Might Be Some Issues: Stories About Therapy (details coming soon), and get on the mailing list by just asking!

PPS.

[UPDATE: The 2011 cals have sold out but you can still donate!] You can buy a 2011 Unexpected Pitbull calendar featuring Maggie Estep and her dog Mickey! (We gave one away at the show.) Maggie says: "It's a great cause, 100% of profits go to helping the hundreds of thousands of pits in shitty situations... So many HUGE misconceptions about these dogs, it's heartbreaking."

Snowstorm? Child's Play.

2011-01-26T16:30:00.002-05:00

Wednesday, January 26th, 2011

This is still happening. Party favors, stories, music, other things. We have important stuff to do tonight, people. Bring an extra pair of socks and some Binaca.

It's All Happening... EVERYTHING!

2011-01-23T18:55:00.003-05:00

More details here...

HOW I LEARNED I WAS BASICALLY IN LOVE WITH YOU: The 2-Year Anniversary Show!

2011-01-13T23:50:00.006-05:00

Thursday, January 13th, 2011

Hi and guess what. The day you've been waiting for is finally pretty much now. You've been parched and starving since the last show in October -- a lifetime ago. After a much needed two-month hiatus replete with... well, frankly, it's all kind of a blur now. The point is I'm here to announce that How I Learned returns in two weeks!

Recently crowned the "Berlitz of bad behavior," How I Learned is reconvening with its first show of 2011, also marking HIL's two-year anniversary. There will be music, party favors, giveaways and of course stories from four literary and comedy superstars. There may also be party hats.

Get ready. We're just warming up.
xo Blaise

The How I Learned Series,
Celebrating Two Years of Pretty Good Entertainment,
is thrilled to present:

HOW I LEARNED I WAS BASICALLY
IN LOVE WITH YOU

Featuring:
MAGGIE ESTEP
(Alice Fantastic; Spoken Word Unplugged)
JAMES HANNAHAM
(God Says No; The Literary Review)
RYAN BRITT
(The Liar Show; The Moth)
AMY SHAPIRO
(Cringe; AKA Pants)

+ Party Favors
+ Book Giveaways
+ A SPECIAL SURPRISE MUSICAL GUEST!

Created, Produced + Hosted by
BLAISE ALLYSEN KEARSLEY

Wednesday, January 26th
8pm / Doors open at 7pm
HAPPY ENDING
302 Broome Street between Forsyth + Eldridge
J, M, Z, F to Delancey
B, D to Grand
NO COVER!

***

MAGGIE ESTEP has published seven works of fiction, three of which keep getting optioned for TV and film and then never getting made. She is currently at work on a book about female gangsters and the founding of the ASPCA in 1868 Manhattan. She divides her time between Arkansas and Woodstock, NY.

JAMES HANNAHAM's first novel, God Says No (McSweeney's 2009) was a finalist for a Lambda Book Award and named an honor book by the American Library Association's Stonewall Book Awards. His stories have been published in The Literary Review, Open City, One Story and will soon appear in Fence, Makeout Creek and possibly ESPN. No, really. His criticism and journalism have appeared in The Village Voice, Spin and Salon.com and have been reprinted in Best African American Essays and Best Sex Writing. He has received fellowships from The MacDowell Colony and Yaddo among many others, and he teaches creative writing at Pratt and The New School.

RYAN BRITT's writing has been published in Opium Magazine, Clarkesworld Magazine, Soon Quarterly, The Rumpus and Nerve. As a performer, he has told stories on stage with The Liar Show, Stripped Stories, The Show and Tell Reading Series and The Moth. Two plays written by Ryan have been produced in NYC. He also directed his most recent play at the 45th Street Theatre in Manhattan. He was recently accepted into the 2011 Sirenland Writing Workshop in Positano, Italy. He contributes regularly to the blog Tor.com and he lives in Brooklyn.

AMY SHAPIRO is living the motherfucking American dream in Brooklyn, NY. After being fired for the 3rd time in 10 years (2nd time in 1 year), she decided to retire at the age of 35. It was at that time that she stopped blogging (soapyt.blogspot.com) and took to standing up in front of audiences telling stories and jokes in the hopes of getting laid. For a good time you can catch her monthly variety show AKA Pants at the Parkside Lounge, which she co-hosts with Alison Leiby and Karen Freer. You can also check out Amy's threads on Facebook if you're a friend of a friend and add her. Other than that, Amy enjoys a simple life of baking, playing with her dolls and watching Hoarders and Intervention.

Here's the event on Facebook for your completely optional RSVP-ing pleasure.

Disgracebook

2010-12-07T13:45:00.000-05:00

Tuesday, December 7th, 2010

Dear Friends and Other People I Care About (That Means YOU),

Have you heard? Basically, the gist of Time Out's latest "Is Social Media Bad for NYC" issue is: Step away from the computer and put down those newfangled superphones at least one night a month. Preferably every 4th Wednesday between, say, 7:30 and 10:00. It's good for you. Doctor's orders, pretty much.

"These recent arrivals to the NYC scene are so compelling you'll want to look away from Facebook--at least for a little while."

Stay Warm,
Blaise

PS. Details on the first super special show of the new year--on January 26th--coming soon. See you on the other side!

HOW TO SUBMIT TO HOW I LEARNED

2010-11-20T03:57:00.018-05:00

Photo: Jon Boulier

The show is heavily curated, but open to submissions. So here's how to toss your hat in the ring:

How I Learned is interested in stories--nonfiction, fiction or something in between--with an element of humor. Stories are read from the page or told straight up or a combination thereof. In keeping with the series' concept, stories should explicitly convey something learned while staying true to the specific topic. Stories are presented by writers, comics, bloggers, actors, storytellers, and other performers and raconteurs. Stories may or may not include an audio/visual element.

1. Attend a show if you haven't already. Obviously, it's the best way to see what it's like and if it's for you. Bonus points if you introduce yourself to me.

2. Email me at howilearned at gmail dot com with "submission" as the subject line and tell me about yourself and the kinds of things you've done.

3. Along with your email, pitch some story ideas that have a "How I Learned..." theme in mind. You can also send me 1 story or a link to a story online--written or performed. Note: If you have a blog you would like to direct me to, PLEASE send links to relevant posts rather than just a link to a homepage. If you have an upcoming show or reading, let me know.

Due to the number of emails I receive, I'm not always able to respond to every one (though I try), so please don't take it personally.

I look forward to hearing from you guys and seeing you at the next show, if not before somewhere. Like, maybe at the grocery store when I haven't showered, or maybe on the subway as I'm heading home from a heavy therapy sesh. That would be perfect.

OK, that's it. Thanks!
xo Blaise

Expect Minimum Sexiness

2010-11-19T18:17:00.005-05:00

Friday, November 19th, 2010

Photo courtesy of Show and Tell

Hello! Blaise here. This Monday, 11/22, I'll be in the inaugural SHOW AND TELL show with How I Learned alumni COLLEEN KANE and ADAM WADE. The theme is Sex Ed and there will be lots of visuals. I think you all know by now how I feel about visuals. (Also, it's featured in this week's Time Out NY.) Do come! Especially if all you're doing is sitting around waiting for the return of HIL in January, which is understandable.

Monday, Union Hall, Park Slope, Brooklyn, 7:30pm, $5. DETAILS...

Paper Airplane Love Note

2010-11-02T14:39:00.001-04:00

Tuesday, November 2nd, 2010

Photo: Jon Boulier

THANK YOU to everyone who came to last week's How I Learned to Believe, and to all of you who've supported the How I Learned series this year! GUYS, I BELIEVE IN YOU!

If you would like to relive some of last Wednesday's glory, or if you missed it altogether, you can listen to TOM SHILLUE's hilarious bit about spiritual belief vs. THE GREATEST COINCIDENCE EVER right here. You can also hear, fortunately for all of us, the lovely and amazing ROSIE SCHAAP's "Bar Car Prophesy" here on This American Life (see ACT TWO). Meanwhile, pick up a copy of The Devil, The Lovers & Me, by the gorgeous KIMBERLEE AUERBACH, which you can then read on the subway on your way to LIAM MCENEANEY's wildly successful show Tell Your Friends! where one of this week's guests happens to be Tom Shillue. Aaaaand we come full circle.

I hope to see you at the next super exciting How I Learned birthday 2011 kick-off spectacular on JANUARY 26th. Save the date. Pen it in. There will be great stories. There will be musical guests. There may also be party hats.

Stay tuned right here for details and other stuff. Keep in touch. And see you soon!

xoxo Blaise

UP NEXT: HOW I LEARNED TO BELIEVE

2010-10-05T00:26:00.011-04:00

I believe in things. I believe it means something when I put iTunes on shuffle and THAT ONE SONG comes on out of 10,000. I believe in ghosts. I believe in hailstorms. I believe Thelma and Louise were real. I believe in love and I believe in How I Learned and I believe in YOU.

In light of this being the last show until January, I also believe that you won't want to wait until 2011 for your free and easy How I Learned-style edutainment. Yes, I said "edutainment."

So, join us. This is a fantastic end-of-the-2010-season lineup. And we'll make super believers out of you.

xoxo Blaise

***

The How I Learned Series presents:

HOW I LEARNED TO BELIEVE

Featuring

TOM SHILLUE

(The Daily Show; Conan O'Brien)

KIMBERLEE AUERBACH

(The Devil, The Lovers & Me; The Moth)

ROSIE SCHAAP

(This American Life; Drinking With Men)

LIAM MCENEANEY

(Tell Your Friends!; Comedy Central)

Created, Produced + Hosted by:

BLAISE ALLYSEN KEARSLEY

Wednesday, October 27th

8:00pm (Doors open at 7:00)

HAPPY ENDING

302 Broome Street btwn Forsyth + Eldridge

(Look for the pink awning that says "XIE HE Health Club")

J, M, Z, F to Delancey

B, D to Grand

FREE!

***

ROSIE SCHAAP has been a bartender, a fortuneteller, a librarian at a paranormal society, an English teacher, a preacher, a community organizer, a manager of homeless shelters, a ghostwriter for an inspirational magazine, and a contributor to NPR's World Cup 2010 blog. Her work has been broadcast on This American Life, and her memoir, Drinking With Men, will be published next year by Riverhead. [Photo: M Sharkey]

LIAM MCENEANEY is a NYC comedian who made his first Comedy Central appearance on Premium Blend. He spent a couple of seasons as a talking head for VH1's Best Week Ever. He also appears in the upcoming Showtime special, Caroline Rhea and Friends. Liam is the producer and star of the upcoming Tell Your Friends! The Concert Film, based on his weekly NYC show at Lolita Bar. The movie also stars Kurt & Kristen, Reggie Watts, Christian Finnegan, and many more. Liam has toured all over the US and internationally, having headlined in England, Ireland, Scotland, Germany and Sweden. For more information on Liam, please feel free to ask.

TOM SHILLUE (www.tomshillue.com) is originally from Norwood, Massachusetts, and is a writer and a comedian who has been seen in his own Comedy Central Presents stand-up special, on Late Night with Conan O'Brien, and in his own segment on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. His autobiographical monologues have become a fixture in the New York downtown comedy scene, and his stories have recently been published in the Ben Karlin anthology Things I've Learned From Women Who've Dumped Me (Grand Central Publishing), and in Afterbirth: Stories You Won't Read in a Parenting Magazine (St. Martin's Press).

KIMBERLEE AUERBACH is an author, storyteller, teacher and private coach. She teaches memoir, humor and creative writing at Mediabistro, UCLA Extension Writers' Program, Gotham Writers' Workshop and The Open Center. She has a thriving private practice, helping people of all ages with personal essays, book proposals and manuscripts. She also counsels 8th grade girls for Liberty Leads at Bank Street College of Education, where she won Teacher of The Year in 2008. You can find out more about Kimberlee and her memoir, The Devil, The Lovers & Me: My Life in Tarot, at www.kimmiland.com. [Photo: Julie Brimberg]

Contact High

2010-09-30T19:29:00.004-04:00

Thursday, September 30th, 2010

Hello! It's me again. Just wanted to share some photos from September's super fun How I Learned, How I Learned to Inhale: Stories About Drugs. We covered a lot of important bases: crack, coke, weed, heroin, ambien, klonopin, ecstasy, post-op meds and also Riverdance.

I'd say more but it's 2am as I write this and I'm exhausted and advanced in age. Oh, but I will say thank you, as always, to the awesome readers and to everyone who came out to Happy Ending. And, okay, I'll say one more thing: October's show will pretty much knock your socks off in a major way, I think. It's October 27th. It's How I Learned To Believe. It's with Tom Shillue and more. Stay tuned for details, and be sure to come because I'm off during November and December and you might suffer some serious withdrawal symptoms during that time. Just so you know.

xoxo Blaise

PS. In the vein of drugs (no pun intended), talented performers and things that are sad: Rest In Peace, Greg Giraldo. We liked him.

EDITH ZIMMERMAN (The Awl; Vulture) talks about post-op healing gone awry due to an allergic reaction. Naturally, the story involves washcloths and Michael Flatley. Find the lovely Edith at www.edithzimmerman.com

The charming TONY O'NEILL reads a story about a rehab stint from his latest book, Sick City, which you're probably going to want to buy if you haven't already. Learn more about Tony, his writing, and his music, at www.tonyoneill.net.

ROYAL YOUNG (Interview; Fame Shark) returns to his roots at Happy Ending. As the story goes, he got into some things there when he was 19. That was, like, last year!* Read more of Royal's writing here, for starters.

The always entertaining JEFF SIMMERMON (The Moth; This American Life) shares a story about online dating, moving to Australia, and doing ecstasy with his soon-to-be ex-girlfriend. That can't end well. Visit Jeff at www.andiamnotlying.com

All photos by Jon Boulier. Hire him.

* I kept joking about How I Learned's drug themed show would be just like Not My Kid, an 80's made for TV movie I was obsessed with as a young girl. Then I realized that 50% of the lineup was born the same year Not My Kid aired. Awesome. Here's some Not My Kid for you:

Up Next: How I Learned Does Drugs

2010-09-07T15:43:00.004-04:00

Hello, September! Let's talk about DRUGS. The hard stuff and the light fair. Prescriptions, uppers, downers, PCP, angel dust, black beauties. It'll be just like that '80s TV movie Not My Kid starring Stockard Channing as the mom and somebody as the kid. Okay, see you there!

The How I Learned Series presents:
HOW I LEARNED TO INHALE: STORIES ABOUT DRUGS

Featuring:
TONY O'NEILL
(Sick City; Down and Out on Murder Mile)
JEFF SIMMERMON
(The Moth; This American Life)
ROYAL YOUNG
(Fame Shark; Interview)
EDITH ZIMMERMAN
(The Awl; New York Magazine's Vulture)

Created, Produced + Hosted by:

BLAISE ALLYSEN KEARSLEY

Wednesday, September 22nd

8:00pm (Doors open at 7:00)
HAPPY ENDING
302 Broome Street
between Forsyth + Eldridge
(Look for the pink awning that says "XIE HE Health Club")
F, J, M, Z to Delancey
B, D to Grand

FREE!

***

TONY O'NEILL (www.tonyoneill.net) is the author of Sick City, Down and Out on Murder Mile and Digging the Vein, and the coauthor of Neon Angel and The New York Times bestseller Hero of the Underground. He lives in New York with his wife and daughter.

EDITH ZIMMERMAN (www.edithzimmerman.com) lives in Brooklyn and writes for New York Magazine's Vulture blog. Her work has also appeared in Esquire, The Awl, Boston Magazine, and Buzzfeed, among others.

ROYAL YOUNG was born and fled the Lower East Side. He just completed his debut memoir, Fame Shark. Excerpts and other work have appeared in The Jewish Daily Forward, Brooklyn The Borough, The Rumpus, New York Press, The Villager, Downtown Express, Chelsea Now, Mr. Beller's Neighborhood and Pomp & Circumstance Magazine.

JEFF SIMMERMON is a writer and storyteller who regularly appears at shows around New York. He has written for Vice Magazine, appeared onstage at The Moth's GrandSlam, and most recently on This American Life. He also runs a blog packed full of stories, art, and other weirdness at www.andiamnotlying.com. And even though he's been writing for years, he never gets any better at doing these bios.

PS. This event is here on the Facebooks for your totally optional RSVPing pleasure.

Best Summertime Traveling Companions Ever!

2010-09-01T01:31:00.002-04:00

Tuesday, August 31st, 2010

If you thought everyone's been out of town, they were just at How I Learned. I'm awestruck by how many folks came out to the show last week--AT THE END OF AUGUST. Also, this travel themed installment was our last show of the summer season. How is it that summer is suddenly over? I don't think it's just because I'm old that time is moving so quickly. I think something pretty serious is going on cosmically. But in the meantime, LET'S NOT PANIC! Here's a recap of last week's How I Learned to Live on the Road: Tales of Travels, Travails, Wanderlust and Out-of-Town Hijinks:

The delightful EMMA STRAUB (Fly-Over State) came straight from the hospital having been there for 36 hours for the birth of a friend's baby. Running on what must have been pure adrenaline, she stepped up to the mic and utterly charmed the audience with a true story about being on the road with a band... sort of. Then I think after that she might have just passed out. Remember what Emma told you: February is not the time to go to Canada. Especially if you don't know how many metric tons your car weighs and all you want is some delicious poutine.

"Every now and then even Montreal gets sick of people loving it all the time and just wants someone to curse it out for being such an asshole."

Intrepid storyteller and nomadic narcoleptic, MELANIE HAMLETT (The Moth), shared a hilarious story about living in her truck last summer and traveling 14,000 miles all over America with nothing but a Dora Explorer pinata and an eye-opening visit from her sister.

Those of you who were blown away by Melanie's story--meaning all of you--will enjoy these photos she sent me.

Meanwhile, the inimitable HUGH RYAN (Details) made his third How I Learned appearance (once in New Orleans!), offering up what he learned from a year of being a professional house sitter in every place from Puerto Rico to Park Slope. Then Hugh left to get mentally prepared for a go-go dancing gig at a greaser theme party later that week. True story.

"Vacation homes are located in places that are amazing about four months out of the year. I lived in them during the other eight."

Finally, the beautiful and multi-talented RACHEL SHUKERT (Have You No Shame?) read from her latest book, Everything Is Going To Be Great: An Underfunded and Overexposed European Tour, a funny and thoughtful memoir about mischief and missteps while traveling abroad in her twenties. Not surprisingly, everyone loved her and her story so much that they snatched up all of the books she was selling that night. (Man, I love the How I Learned crowd.) Look at all the great reviews she's getting.

"Um, I'm Jewish. I don't know if that's obvious or not, but it made a difference in Austria."

Such a great lineup and an awesome audience. To further illustrate, please now enjoy more photos from the official How I Learned photog, JON BOULIER. (Plus, even more photos from this show and previous shows in the How I Learned Facebook group if you like looking at photos or whatever.)

Thank you so much for coming out last week! Join me on September 22nd for HOW I LEARNED TO INHALE: STORIES ABOUT DRUGS. It's a pretty good way to start the Fall. Guests will be Tony O'Neill (Sick City), Jeff Simmermon (This American Life), Edith Zimmerman (The Awl), and Royal Young (Fame Shark). Stay tuned!

xoxo Blaise

Photos: Jon Boulier